Mare's nest

Chapter 9

Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Tick-tock.

I hate this clock sound, so it's like a good reminder of emptiness. It's everywhere: in the air, in this room, in me, in my ears, in my mind. Everywhere! Ah!

Tick-tock. Tick-tock. Tick-tock.

How much time have I stared at the clock above the door? Was it here at all? Sometimes I think I'm lost. The more time I'm here, the more I think so [by the way how much time have I been here? Somebody tells me].

"Jelly?" mum's voice backs me to reality. It's like I just woke up. I have a look at the room and found out I've been here not alone all this time [what?]. Mum sits on the chair near the door and uncle Cluk [my savior!] took his sit on the yellow armchair [was it here?] near the window. They both look calm. So sad I don't know how I look.

There is no tension in the room. It looks like a psychotherapist's appointment. Well, I sit on the covered with pillows. Uncle goes first.

"Well, Jelly, Rose told me what happened. So, it's very important to find the right key —"

Blah-blah-blah. I don't listen to him. I'm not interested in it. Totally! I. D. G. F. That is! He can leave all these explanations to mum. Yeah, she's listening to him very attentively, knocking her head every time he explains the main features of our today's conversation as if she understood every single word. Blah-blah-blah.

The most interesting in this... hm... I got the point; I've never been outside these days. Yes! It is. How many days passed? I know that there is more than one! All these days in one room... Impossible! I'm not hungry, I'm not thirsty, I'm not alive!

Ah! I'm done! The only person I can trust is uncle Cluk!

I interrupt him in the middle of his lecture about the importance of focusing on reality in such cases. "Stop it!"

They look so embarrassed. Their faces are like when you see a monster or a ghost. Boo!

"Honey is every—" mum has tears in her eyes. Since when had she become so sensitive?

"Rose, please" Cluk looks at mum and points her to try to control herself. "I know how difficult it is, so is there anything you'd like to tell us?"

Oh. My dear Cluck there are many things I want to tell you! "Yeap, but I want to have a conversation only with you. I'm sorry, mum. Can you excuse us?" At first, she's like to say something but then runs away slamming the door.

Now I'm happy to have a chance to be with a person I trust to. "Would you like to sit closer, Uncle Cluk?"

He says nothing, just takes a sit on the bed near me, looks at me...

Shhhh!

Ah! I turn around. Nobody's here so I move on. Don't know where to go and how I can get to the camp, just follow the forest's path.

Take breathe in, take breath out. Goddess! I swear I'll move to the deep forest after university life and start my writing career! Nature inspires me. All this atmosphere is like a light to my mind, I can free it here... I can feel it here... I swear I'll move to the deep forest one day.

It's sunset. I am still in my unknown way. There are tall trees and bushes around me, so sometimes I have to wade through the branches. A bird's sinning a beautiful song [I wish I could do the same!].

I don't know how much time has passed, but walking along the path I come out to the cliff. The view is picturesque! If I were an artist, I would take a look at it and would draw a masterpiece. If only my life were a masterpiece! I'm not an artist even though I'm not sure I'm a good writer as well.

I feel my eyes get wet. There are many 'if only' words in my life. It's a stunning sunset and I can taste the salt of my tears [The salt of my life]. Why did I do this? Why did I stay in that hut? Why did I give in to feelings that maybe don't exist at all? Have I betrayed my real feelings? I have no answers... I'm confused. If only!

I feel a light touch on my shoulder. I know it. Why? "Why did you come?"

I hear this silky voice. I want to forget everything and hear it as often as possible. "Why did you leave?"

Shhhh!

to be continued...