Wishing And Wondering ⚣

Eleventh Hour

Chapter Eleven: Eleventh Hour

"There's more to you than meets the eye
Like the chapters
Of my life
I can't stop reading you
And I can't wait to see
What happens next
The future always at the front of my mind
But as I look behind me
With the past steadily
Trying to catch me
I realize I'll never escape the memories
Like the first part to a trilogy
All that matters is the ending
And my book ends with
you
and
me"

Jackson

"I have to go now." Ethan laughed. I refused to let him leave the bed, I kissed his neck and blew raspberries on the base of his throat.

"Mmmm, no." I kissed him more, and he laughed at me harder. Soon the tickling stopped and we lay peaceful in the bed. He's so beautiful in the morning, the mural he accidentally painted in Italian is behind him, his blue eyes shine in the morning sunbeams, his hair is tousled from sleeping heavily.

"I do have to leave you know." He frowned. "I will be back." I nod and continue to admire him. So beautiful, "I love you." He said, "be back soon." I nodded once more and let an 'I love you' slip. He smiled and suddenly disappeared. Just gone, so quickly. I continue to lay by myself for a while, until I realize I have stuff to do. With one last look at our mural, I head to the computer to look for jobs.

"Sii Felice" I tell myself. "Work towards a better life. Be happy."

All day I worked, filed my insurance, looked into new cars, into new jobs got my student loans squared away, cleaned the house and looked at puppies for sale. Today was the day that I knew I would get my life together, Ethan is watching and I know it.

For the next few months, as much as Jackson grieved, he picked up the shards of his life. He bought a dog, a Burmese mountain dog called Romeo, he bought a new car, I simple 2016 four door jeep, he got a new job as a nurse practitioner, and he waited for his love.

Though Jackson's depressive thoughts would get the best of him sometimes, what if Ethan's plan was to get his life together and never come back? He couldn't only be my miracle, what if he's with someone else? And so on.

Sometimes he though he saw Ethan out of the corner of his eyes, waving, saying hello. Other times he thought he heard Ethan, his sweet voice cascading through the halls. Sometimes it was scary, like Ethan was a haunting ghost, but in reality, it was just Jackson's imagination.

Falling into the tenth month of Ethan being gone and Jackson's conversations had fallen to merely his human friends, depressing, imperfect, dull. He could only imagine how Ethan felt in such a boring place.

Jackson's dreams were dripping with tears by the twelfth month. An entire year Ethan was gone and Jackson couldn't help but dream of his life without Ethan. Their time together was short, and Jackson was hopelessly confused during 90% of it, but there was something special about their months together that made Jackson crave his angel.