who
who is reading this
because it has 42 views, 5 (now 6) chapters
and i have 12 followers, most of which are very inactive
this dont add up
so can u like tell me pls ty unless ur name is my gf because i already know u do
okay cough cough anyways
im here to be angry >:o
~rant~
i've already complained about this to someone, but i need to complain about it MORE because im MAD about it
My band director and my mother are both very... proud, or i guess confident in my ability to play the clarinet
During Marching Band I would do clinical with judges and stuff, and I would ALWAYS hear some judge say something like "Wow I'm really impressed by your clarinetist" and my band director would be like "omg ty uwu he's our only one" like stfu it's not about u
anyways
my mom is also basically the same way, talking about "uGh it'd be so awesome if he got a scholarship uwu uwu uwu"
1. im not that good :l
2. s t o p
But since I'm oh so amazing ahHhHhhh apparently, when again, I'm not
I've received emails from my band director, and have also been privately confronted by him
and he just wanted me to audtion for all state, saying he wouldn't have asked me if he didn't believe I had a chance
I talked to my mom about it, saying that I didn't think I had enough time. I told her when the auditions were, and she was like "Oh, you have enough time." and... never said anything else about it
So I emailed my band director saying I'd do it, and now he's already told the people who run auditions that I am, so I can't go back on it.
I've looked at the audition material and stuff, and it's not too bad.. I have to play every scale (there's like 15) at a minimum of 144 bpm. I've already done that with one of the scales, which I think means I can probably do it with the others
I have to play a chromatic scale made up of just... every note... at a minimum of 167 bpm, which is gonna be tough
There are 101 terms I need to know, and I already know 46 so that's cool
There's an etude I need to practice.. hopefully that won't be too hard
And I already chose a solo that I've been playing for a few weeks now
BUT THE REASON IM MAD
IS BECAUSE I WAS FORCED INTO THIS
and
these people are expecting too much of me and not giving me enough time
if i weren't in school, i could probably do it
but I AM IN SCHOOL obviously because it's all state
and christmas is coming
and over the break i wont get to practice unless I bring my clarinet and all my music everywhere, which is at least 5 different houses in 5 different cities
so just
i'm overwhelmed
and a little pissed
pissed at the people who are supposed to be supporting me and helping me for forcing me to do something im not ready for
and pissed at myself for not saying no to them
well actually i did... they just kept asking until i didn't anymore :')
but
yeah
that's all
sorry i talked about how clearly superior i am
but idk who reads this shit, maybe it's all yes-men and band geeks
idk lol
yeah so wish me luck
or not
im done
i just like typing
yes
ur hot
ok bye
