The Legends Of Merder

The one where I teach Derek something...

Author's note....

Hey Grey anatomy fans, how you all doing??

So this is not about a real episode. This is sort of my way to vent out my frustration on my favourite characters...

If you also felt frustrated with the characters sometimes and wanted to knock some sense into them, you might like this..

This takes place after Season 4 episode 4 where Derek tells Meredith how he wants a lifetime with her.

3rd person POV

Derek who had been planning a happy sneak out of city with Meredith just told her what his real plans are. She tells him she is not ready for it and while he understands that it feels like a torture. Seeing her pushing everyone away from her. He knows she is trying to protect herself but daamn sometimes he feels frustrated.

He is lying in his trailer thinking about all this when he hears a voice "Hello DR. Shepherd".

Startled he gets up and there she is a beautiful, Mysterious woman on the small breakfast table of his trailer.
"Who are you? How did you get in here? What are you doing here?" He asks questions one after another as his thaught process is interrupted by this beautiful but annoying woman.

"It doesn't matter who I am. We need to talk." The woman says.

"I don't know you, why would I need to talk to you." He says as he subtly looks around for some way to protect himself if the mysterious woman actually turns out to be dangerous.

"Trust me you want to talk to me" she says confidently.

"And stop looking around for something to defend. I am here just to talk. I am not gonna harm you." She adds as he keeps on ignoring her.

He looks baffled at her. He assumes her to be some body language analyst who is there to rob him or kill him out of vengeance.

"If you want to talk we can talk at the hospital, but please not here. " He calmly says as if trying to sound empathetic.

"Even if it's about Meredith grey?" The woman says.

This gets his attention as he sits down.

"How do you know Meredith?" He asks with a panicked.

"I knew her name will get me your attention." The woman smugly says.

"You wanna get to the point or should I call the police?" He asks already frustrated with her.

"Ok ok. So first of all let me make this clear. I know everything about you and Meredith's relationship."

Derek looks a little baffled and a little scared at that.

"That can not be true. Are you a spy or something? Cause I don't have any super secret info to give you." He smugly says as if he had already called out on the woman's bluff.

She scoffs at that. "Meredith is right about you. You are truly a ' brain-less brain man'." And then laughs.

"You know Meredith. And when did she say that? She talks about me?" He asks one after other. Last one with a hopeful look.

"She doesn't know me. But I know her. I know each one of you."

"Then what do you want from me?" He asks exasperatedly. He is now annoyed with this woman, coupled with the day's exhaustion he thinks he might just die of a brain bleed there.
(A/N:- Oh, The irony 🤣😭)

"We need to talk" she parrots once again.

"Okay. I am listening. Start talking." He says just to get it over with.

"What happened today?" She asks.

" Well since you are the all knowing woman. You tell me what happened today?" He says.

"You told all of your plans. How you don't want 48 uninterrupted hours. You want a lifetime with a marriage and kids and dream House."

His eyes get a little misty as he thinks back to his conversation with her. Moreover Meredith's reaction to it.

"That's true. She is the love of my life. I want all that with her." He says not wanting to add more than necessary.

She sighs and says" I know. I know you felt hurt today. I know how much you hurt everytime she pushes you away."

"What do I do now?" He asks helplessly.

"You know you are my dream man Derek. The way you love her. That's a dream come true for anyone. "

"And yet the one woman I love keeps pushing me away." He sighs.

"I know. And I know you also know why she does that." She says.

"I am in a dilemma. I can't walk away from her and I can't be with her. How do I fix this?"

"You love her. In all sense of that word . And she loves you."

He shakes his head at the last sentence.

"She does. She is just afraid. She is afraid of loving you. You remember the day she drowned?"

"How can I forget the worst day of my life?"

"That was a cry of help. Her cry of help." She says.

"But I am here for her. For whatever she needs . She won't let me help her."

"Because she thinks of herself as a drowning ship. She thinks she is saving you by pushing you away. The problem ain't that she doesn't love you. The problem is she doesn't love herself. She is on a self-sabotage mission."

"Clearly" he spits.

"She needs to love herself to love you. And she can't do that with this constant work of keeping you interested in her.

" She doesn't need to keep me interested. I love her. I am in for the long haul." He defends herself.

"But then you go being sad around her all the time. Telling her your dreams and all. That puts pressure on her."

"So you are saying that I am stoping her from loving herself."

"Nooo. I am saying that with you being in the picture she is not getting the clarity. Since you are with her physically she is not realising what actually being with you means. She is not going to take help unless something big happens in her life."

"I can't walk away from her. I can't leave her. She is the love of my life." He says almost on the verge of crying.

"Even it means lifetime of hurt for you. You are not walking away from her. You are just asking for what you want. Love yourself too Derek. Walk away if you get anything less than you deserve. This is her fight. Let her fight her demons and if then she gives you what you want. Go for it."

"I can't." He sobs as tears roll down his eyes.

The woman walks towards him and hugs him as he cries.

"Just think about it. Ok?"

And she keeps soothingly rubbing his back while he cries about his love life.

In the morning, the woman is gone and Derek is in his bed. His eyes are puffy as if he had cried rivers but there is no other evidence of the previous night's incidence.

So..... Here is another chapter of my rant.

What did you think of it?

What episode would like me to do next?

I want to just clarify. These are my thoughts on the relationship. I know some people think of Derek as toxic in this episode and I did too at first. But somehow I get it now.

I know how it is to love someone who does't love themselves.

Pls comment, vote and share.

I love you all.

And #merderforever❤️

Okay bye...