one voice

Chapter two~ May

I grab my laptop, hands shaking.

It's time.

@onevoice: I'm going online in a few minutes! See you then :)

I smile as I set up my keyboard and microphone. I cover the camera with black card, making sure there's no way I could be seen.

I can never be seen.

It's time.

I hit the go live button and thousands of comments pop up. I gasp, my eyes widening.

Already, 1,000 people are listening to me. Waiting for me to perform, asking me so may things...and they're pretty much all lovely, asking me to never give up, to help them. They keep telling me how much they love me.I'm not scared. These people want me to keep doing what I love. That means a whole lot more then they will ever know.

No one knows its me. I can sing, play, do anything because no one knows who is doing it all.

That's the great thing about the internet. It's anonymity. You can have the freedom to be yourself, without anyone finding you, hating on you, blaming you....

Stopping you.

I smile and begin to play on the keyboard, my voice blending with the sweet tune. I close my eyes.

I'm in heaven.

***

Four songs later, I'm calm, happy. My broadcast has gained over 1 million views in the short time I've been doing it.

"Thankyou. You have no idea what this means to me...but I know you guys keep asking me to reveal myself. I'm not going to do that, for multiple reasons, but I hope you guys keep coming back to hear me. Thanks for watching...bye!" I say quietly and I end the broadcast.

By the end, my heart is racing. I'm buzzing, the adrenaline zipping through my veins.

Every time I do this, it makes me feel so much better.

I laugh then. It's my only chance to forget how hellish my life really is.

I put all my stuff away, savouring my happiness while its lasting. I quickly tweet once again.

@onevoice: thankyou to everyone who watched. Tune in again tommorow at 5pm (English time!) To listen to my new song. I hope to see you there! Xx

I close my laptop, a rush of satisfaction passing through me.

Your doing okay, April.

But I know what comes next.

I pad downstairs, noticing how empty our small house is. Both my dad and mum are working, and they think I'm old enough to look after myself.

I should be.

I slide open the back door, and step out into our small garden. It's crammed full of brightly coloured flowers, fresh and beautiful. Bee"s bumble around, clumsy and round, whilst pale butterflies flitter delicately. They are so different in comparison.

I choose an elegant sunflower, gently plucking it from the ground. It's a sunny shade of yellow, the petals sculpted to perfection.

It's like its made for her.

I try to smile once again, but its fake. My happiness is drained when I think of her.

She wouldn't want it this way. Be strong for her.

"I'm trying" I whisper. "I really am, May"

***

As I reach the tall iron gates, I suck in a breath.

It's now that I always feel like I can't face it. I feel like I should turn back, leave what I should have left months ago.

But I never do.

I enter the small cemetery, which is silent.

May would've hated it. She would have frowned and told me it was too quiet and that when your dead, you should be celebrating. She would dance down the aisles of dull stone, singing at the top of her voice, laughing, smiling.

As I reach the beautiful marble cut headstone, I gently place the sunflower down on the earth.

"They were always your favourite. I'm sorry I don't have more of them...they're only just starting to grow. They remind me of you, May. You were always the bright one, always the leader" I whisper, trying hard not to cry.

May would've hated this. She couldn't stand seeing me cry. She would always watch my face crumple and frown hard. Then she would pull me into a hug, saying, "dontcrydontcrydontcry" over and over again until I stopped and started laughing at the meaningless gabble of words tumbling from her lips.

I continue talking to her.

"I wrote you a song the other day. It's called the spring girl. I'll...I'll sing it for you tommorow, May. I know how much you loved to hear me sing to you" I smile faintly at the memories of long nights. If she woke up from a nightmare, I woke up too.

"Sing to me, April?" She would be me quietly. I would always nod and softly sing until she fell asleep. She was my older sister, but I always did this for her.

She never treated me like a baby. Only as her best friend.

"I...I've got to go now May. I hope you like your flower" I say with a smile even though the tears are trickling down my cheeks. I stand up, and turn away from the marble headstone.

"I love you" I whisper before walking away.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see a boy standing far behind me. I spin around to see him staring.

And that's when I run.

***

Hi!

Again, its been a while...I'm trying to update alot of things so bear with.

Thanks for reading ❤

Amelie
Xoxo