Matthew

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MATTHEW


            Sitting in the couch, with the television on some lame game show, I thought about Jeanne. I was thinking much about her. Adding words to my write ups, I cannot deny that I was drift away thinking about Jeanne. Can it be her? Can I open my heart again? Or will it remain close until it  becomes cold?

I curled in bed then Bernard, my furry cat, jumped over me.
“ Hey Bernard! I can’t wait to for you to meet her”
He made a sound. Meow!
I let out a smile.

In my dream, there was the clashing of metal and muteness in the air, everything was upside down . I see her eyes closed and her wet hair covered half of her face. I smell the stain of blood slowly dripping from her head. We are upside down.
The car crash.
My fiancée.
Blood.
Death.
Lauren !

My eyes widely open, my heart was racing and I breathing heavily inhaling and exhaling. It wasn’t a terrible dream. In fact, it happened to my life three years ago. I haven’t recovered an incident yet. I’m haunted by the memory of my fiancée. We are supposed to be together now, but it didn’t happen. I tried to relax. My burst of adrenaline fades.

The next few days, I spent my time in the office finishing some paper works, editing articles, contacting agencies. All I do is work. I realized that I’m struggling to have my life back. I wake up each morning hurrying myself for work. Go home exhausted from the office. I clearly have no time for myself. Work was like an epidemic. I was an example of a drenched workaholic.
I check on some tweets and while I was scrolling, I was surprised that an old friend is in town.

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