Depressing Poems

What if?

What if I was dead?
Would you care about me then?
Or would you play that old same move over and over again like how you used to do it when we were kids you said you loved me..You said you cared about me..but you didn't mean that at all..I was so blind and so stupid I let you go on about everything you wanted to I felt loved by you but..as all pretty rain must come to and end Just why was mine so soon?
I still sit here thinking everyday what if I never met you what if I wasn't here anymore what if what if what If just repeats in my head over and over till maybe one day they'll all just go poof out my mind why do I love you this is so not fair why can't I just not be jealous why do you take advantage I know if I love you again you'll leave me again my friends tell me but it adds pressure so what if I said I loved you one last night what if it was the last time I ever something would you love me then?

 
                                       Author Note
Heyy been awhile since I wrote in this one!!Some was written in December and some was written just now! Hope you enjoyed!!