"My Sweetheart"

It Only Weakens

A few days have passed and my illness has only gotten worse, many visits with Singed and he still hasn't found a way to stop it. Silco only worries more and more as it becomes harder for me to eat, sleep and even get out of bed in the mornings, I've coughed up at least a river of blood and thrown up as much as my body can handle. My bones weak from lack of nutrition, my stomach empty as I lack an apatite, Silco's had to force feed me for me to even eat, I've been to scared I'll throw it up. Today was a better day, I got out of bed without assistants, today it feels like I might finally be getting better, I slowly walk into the kitchen of the underground base and meet with Silco, "morning," he says with the same saddening look he's had on his face the past four days, "you're allowed to smile ya know?" I chuckle sarcastically walking behind him wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my left cheek on his back. I clear my throat and soon cough I little, the cough however, wasn't followed by a blood splatter, but a purple sticky substance, I let go on Silco to observe the substance further, without taking my eyes off it, I take a seat on the wooden table next to me. It has a shimmer type color to it, but the consistency of it was thick and slimy, "Silco..." I say concerningly, Silco comes behind me leaning slightly on my back and rubbing my shoulders as he looks over my head and focuses his eyes onto my hands, "Azia... what's that?" he asks, "I coughed it up just now," I turn my head to look up at him as he towers over me. 'I wish he would stop calling me Azia, I miss when he used to call me Azi ' I think to myself, my expressions sadden even more as Silco doesn't reply. "Silco?" I questioned as I wipe the substance off my hands using the same blood covered handkerchief, "it's getting worse, isn't it, it's obvious" he states, after each day, his voice has become sadder, and less positive. Unfortunately he's right, it has gotten worse, "which means, we should be making the most out of what time I might have left," I say forcing a smile, Silco whips his head to face me, "time left? what are you implying?" he snaps furrowing his eyebrows, wrinkles have formed on his forehead from the amount of worry his eyebrows have carried these past few days. "I'm saying that I think I'm dying, Silco... Singed agrees with me, you can see it, Silco. My body is slowly decomposing, I feel it worsening everyday," my voice cracks as I fight the urge to cry, "no... no. No you're not dying, Azi! You can't!" He exclaims bursting into tears, "I can't lose you..." He whispers, I walk over to him as he stands in the middle of the large room that had collected shelves and bottles and other decorative things over the time we've spent here together. "It's the inevitable, you can't stop it... So let's just... enjoy what we have left," I say holding back tears as I hug him gently. Silco doesn't hug me back, he just stands there, "you're asking me to enjoy life... knowing damn well yours is about to end. It's asking too much," he replies calmly, "please, Silco... For me, at least" I look up at him breaking the one-sided hug, Silco down at me, he flashes me a forced smile and hugs me tightly, "for you, Sweetheart... I'd do anything," he whispers into my ears, a smile forms on my face and I feel happiness for the first time in days. After a long moment of short bliss, I look up at Silco with the same lasting smile on my face and stand on my tippy toes grabbing the back of his neck pulling him in for a kiss, Silco places his hands on my waist and pulls me closer to him. Butterflies swarm in my stomach from the long awaited physical affection from Silco, the feeling of his lips on mine were dreadfully refreshing and I felt better almost immediately, I never want this moment to end.

About a week later, Silco and I have been spending a lot more time together doing things we love and used to do when we were younger. We both hoped that putting a genuine smile on my face would magically heal me of the sickness that withers me slowly and painfully. We visited the streets of the underground more often and we explored new places, avoiding any place near The Last Drop. 

It's now late afternoon and it's almost sunset. Silco's rushing me out the door by my wrist and a large and excited smile on his face, this is the most genuinely happy I've seen him in weeks. Out the door we go and onto the streets, I'm still tired and my throat is sore and my eyes are red and stinging, "Silco where are you taking us?" I say weakly, "It's a surprise, sweetheart" he replies placidly. I chuckle as he helps me onto one the highest rooftop in the undercity. When he finally reach the top, the sky is bright orange and the clouds are a nice tint of pink. My mouth drops as I look around, I can see everything from up here, "look over there," Silco guides my vision to the upside, "it's Piltover!" I exclaim excitedly. After hours of sitting on this rooftop, Silco has my left hand resting on his as we watch the people of the undercity walk the streets, 'I wonder if I can see The Last Drop from here' I ask myself, Looking down to my left, I see a familiar blue light up sign, "The Last Drop" the sign reads, a calm smile forms across my lips, the blissful moment is soon cut short as I watch as a very tall and buff man walks out of the bar with a sac over his shoulder, my eyes widen and I sit up quickly trying to get a closer look, taking my hand off of Silco's, he looks my way and tries to look where I am, "what is it?" he asks curiously, "Vander..." I whisper, Silco chuckles in disbelief, "that's impossible, he was kill-" Silco stops himself as he sees the same man I'm looking at, "Silco... That's my brother," I say not taking my eyes off Vander as I watch him put trash into a large dumpster bin, Silco stays quiet, I assume it's because he was sure he had killed him in that river many years ago. "Let's go home," I turn my head to look at Silco, "what? Are you not going to-" He asks, "no... I don't want him to see me like this, malnourished, sick and weak... He wouldn't even recognize me" I sigh before standing up, "Don't you want to see him before you... die?" Silco hesitates, I pause to reconsider, I look back at Vander as he laughs with his regulars, "no... No I don't" I answer. Silco nods and takes my hand leading me off the building and back onto the streets. The walk home was quiet, the only noise that was made was the sound of my coughs and sniffles followed by the sound of Silco's heeled boots hitting the concrete floor. When we finally reached the base, I opened the door and headed straight for my room, "Azi... Do you want to talk about it?" Silco asks quietly, I stop walking but don't turn around, I slightly move my head to the side seeing Silco appear in my peripheral vision, "maybe another time, I'm tired, Silco" I continue walking into the freezing cold room, "very well," Silco sits on the couch as I close the door to my bedroom and put my legs under the sheets and stare at my ceiling thinking about earlier tonight. 'Vander's alive... But how? I didn't see him swim to the surface after Silco had stabbed him in self defense' I wonder. Becoming more and more tired as thoughts swarm my head, 'I'm just glad I could see him one last time' before I could fall asleep, I notice it feels a lot more peaceful then usual, my body finally feels relaxed and my worry has stopped for the moment, I close my eyes and fall into a deep sleep. My mind clears.

SILCO'S POV:

The next morning arrives and I had slept in, I get out of bed and dress myself mentally preparing for the day a head of me. I open my door expecting to see Azi and Singed in the kitchen eating breakfast or talking, but to my surprise, I only see Singed. In confusion I turn to Singed who's reading a book on the couch, "where's Azi?" I ask, Singed turns to me and points to Azi's door, my eyes shift to see that she has not yet come out of her room, 'that's weird, she usually always opens it when she wakes up' I slowly walk towards her door as a gut ranching feeling builds in my stomach, like evil butterflies, I worry more and more each step closer I take, I place my hand on the handle and a loud but bearable ringing gains in my ears, I immediately think somethings wrong, I furrow my eyebrows intensely as I fling the door open and run towards her bed, Azi lays on her back with blood dripping out of her mouth, down her cheek and onto the wooden floors, I place my knuckles on her face feeling her temperature. She's cold as ice. Tears fill my eyes as I frantically ask her questions, "Azi! Azi wake up! Can you hear me? Azi!" I exclaim causing Singed to rush into the room stopping at the door, He walks in seeing me cradling Azia on the floor in my arms as I sob. "No, please... Azi I need you," I can no longer yell, as my throat becomes filled with loud sobs. Singed stands in the door way, I look up at him with tears streaming down my face, "she's gone, she's dead..." I once again burst into tears and hold her lifeless body in my arms as I lean over her intensely sobbing, "I need you here with me, please... my sweetheart." My heart sinks further into my stomach and slowly drowns in my tears when my words make no change in her state, "Silco..." Singed sighs empathetically, "YOU DID THIS!" I yell, my sadness turning into anger, I need someone to blame, "YOU KILLED HER!" My voice breaks and tears fills my eyes making my vision blurry, I storm towards him as he backs away in fear, his back shortly hits the wall behind him. I sob and sob some more as I grab Singed's shirt violently punching him in the face causing his head to hit the wall, I grab his forehead tightly and ignore his muffled screams for me to stop, and I bash his head into the wall. I violently throw him across the room and pant as he looks up at me with blood covering his face, "Silco... Azia wouldn't want you to react this way" rage builds up in my body, as does the urge to cry some more, "DON'T USE HER NAME AGAINST ME! How dare you... How dare you" I whine as I fall to my knees in defeat and my face becomes soaked in tears as I place my head in my hands. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Azi" I grieve, I feel Singed's hand rub my back in attempts to comfort me. Nothing at this point can help the fact that the love of my life is dead on the floor not even five feet away from me. I lift my head turning it to look at Azi's body laying lifeless on the cold, blood stained floor. I sniffle as I crawl over to her body one more time before holding her cold and pale head in my lap, I lean down to kiss her forehead as my lips quiver, small whimpers escape my mouth as I grieve over her body with Singed hovering over me. 

For hours on end, I laid with her body on the floor, unable to leave her, not knowing what to do with her, I held her cold and frail hands in my large heated ones, my face still hot from crying, I pant as I hear footsteps approach the room. It's Singed. I stand to my weak feet as he leans against the door frame with a bandage covering his head. He looks over to Azi's body and back to me, "what are you going to do now," he asks, with no motivation to speak, I shrug my shoulders and continue to zone out on a space on the floor, not once in my life have I felt so numb. The smell of rotting corpse has increased over the hours, I turn to Azia and sigh, I look up at Singed and my eyes are redder then raw meat. I build up the courage to speak, "you take care of her body, I'm going to my office," I say without emotion as I slowly stand walking past him in the doorway and head to my office. The urge of tears begins to slowly creep up the more my mind wanders back to the moment I woke up not having any idea what was a head of me, finding my girlfriend dead, 'what a pleasant cup of tea' I think sarcastically to myself. As I arrived at my office desk, flashbacks of the times we had in this filled my head, having no tears left to cry, I reach into my desk drawer and pull out the bottle of whiskey I had stolen from Vander's bar. Followed by the bottle of Whiskey, I pull out a short clear glass, for a moment, I stare blankly at the glass before gripping it tightly and with all my anger, I throw in into the wall across the room, causing the glass to shatter into a million pieces. I take a large sip of the whiskey before placing it on the desk in front of me. In one quick movement, I lift my chair up into the air and throw it in the same direction as the glass. I continue to destroy my entire office before screaming my lunges out at nothing but myself, "how could I be so stupid, stupid, STUPID!" I exclaim hitting my head with my fists. Now laying down with the bottle of Whiskey in hand, I sob whilst I lay among the shattered glass scattered across the floor. 

Today was the last time I let myself get attached to someone I could possibly lose.