Fill My Heart With Your Love

chapter 6

We arrive back at Emma's house after a walk filled with an awkward silence. She helps me carry the suitcase up to her room. I thank her for being so supportive in this miserable time for me. "No problem Riv, I'll always be here for you." she tells me. I look up from my suitcase smiling at her. We unpack all my stuff in silence putting it in her closet. "Why did you grab my hand when we entered your parents house?" she asks me. I stop with what i'm doing: " I was stressed and needed some comfort." I tell her not turning around to face her. "Oh okay." she says in a weird tone. I ignore it and put away the last clothes. I close up the suitcase putting it on the corner of the room. I sit myself down on the bed in front of Ems. She looks up smiling, I can see tears forming in her eyes. I scoot my body closer to hers, taking her into a hug. "What's wrong Ems?" I ask rubbing her back. She doesn't answer me, sobbing in my shoulder. She pulls me closer to her, laying us down. She pulls her face away from my shoulder, looking me in the eyes still crying. 

she fell asleep crying 20 minutes ago. I have been laying there caressing her head. I stand up from the bed as quiet as possible going to get some water. When I walk back into her room she is sitting up. When she hears me, she looks at me and directly looks away. "Are you okay?" I ask her sitting back down. "Yeah I'm fine." she says. "You know you can tell me if something is wrong." I tell her. "I know." she says. She stands up from the bed walking out of the room. A few minutes later I hear the shower running. I grab one of my books and start reading. 

A few days later

"This is like the worst show ever!" Emma laughs. "It's not that bad." I say to her. "Riv It really is so bad." She says still laughing. "Okay maybe you're right." I give in laughing with her. We sit there laughing for what feels like hours. She puts her head on my shoulder trying to stop laughing. I freeze instantly, hoping she didn't notice. She takes her head off my shoulder. I panic even more until she asks me: "I'm going to get a drink want something?" I loosen up and answer her: "Yeah, a coke please." She walks out the door and down the stairs. I feel like I can finally breathe again. I go to grab my notebook and try to put what just happened into words.

You remind me that my heart is still alive

Because every time I feel your touch

It skips a beat

And brings me back to life

These words describe the exact feeling. That I felt just a few minutes ago. I write the date and the exact time on the bottom of the page and close it. As Emma walks back in I put away the notebook. "Were you writing?" she asks me handing me the coke. "Yeah, it's my vent book. I write everything I feel in it." I tell her. "Do you really write everything in it? is that even possible?" she asks me. "Well I try to, sometimes I don't but there is a reason for it." I tell her. "And what is the reason you don't sometimes." She answers me with another question. "Well there are actually two reasons. One is that I just forget or don't have my notebook with me. And two is that I can't put the feeling in to words." I answer her question. she stays quiet this time and nods. 

Emma's pov:

I walk back into my room, seeing River put away a notebook. I ask her if she was writing. I didn't think she was gonna tell me but she did. She told me what the notebook is what she does with it. I wanted to ask her another question but I kept quiet not wanting to bother her with all the questions I still want to ask. I start thinking about the last thing she said. "I can't put the feeling into words" that sentence is the only thing going around in my brain right now.