Under Chateau Lights | Complete

33 | You Can't Do This

"You have two boyfriends?" Gerard's mouth hangs open as he sits beside me in the dressing room waiting for Mother to send the guests home before my roasting can commence. Christian and the cars are nowhere to be seen so I'm stuck here until she shows up.

"She has one boyfriend," Elodie explains as she packs up her things. "And one best friend that could have been a boyfriend if she hadn't bungled it."

"That is not true! I have no boyfriends."

"That might be accurate after tonight, Jules. You gotta tell them the truth!" Gerard clearly cannot believe I'm capable of keeping two men around anymore than I can.

"Look, Gerard, I'm about to get yelled at. I don't need your sass right now, okay?"

"You most certainly do," my mother's stern voice says from behind me. "Would you mind telling me what on earth is going on? Why is a man who broke up with you a year ago wandering in here telling me he's your boyfriend and delighted to meet me?"

My siblings scatter faster than I've ever seen them move and I'm left alone to contend with my mother. The bright lights above the mirrors mock me with their low hum.

"I don't know why he was here, Ma. I didn't invite him!" It takes all my concentration to keep myself from rubbing my eyes or yelling at her.

"You know damn well I demand an explanation for why this man is calling himself your boyfriend after all of this. And how he managed to interrupt Meabh and Pierre's event. We're lucky he wasn't seen. You're lucky he left without a fight."

"I didn't invite him here! I didn't want a scene any more than you did! And I'm not even a little bit lucky he's stopped fighting, Ma. I wish he would have blown the whole thing up rather than this. I can't-" I throw my hands up in the air. There's no way I'm going to get through to her but I can't just sit here and let her yell at me. "And Mother, I can't control what other people do or say."

She stops dead in her tracks, like my words have formed a wall between us. Finally, she sinks down into a nearby chair and I have to strain to hear her. "Why? Sweetie, why would you return to a man who broke your heart?"

Dad joins the conversation from the doorway. "You could have come to us." He's probably trying to be helpful but he's just making it far worse. I can't lie to him and he knows it, soft eyes staring into mine.

The words flow out of me as readily as the tears and I struggle to make my sentences comprehensible amid the flood. "Because he never broke my heart, okay? I broke his. And now I've done it again and I need to fix it. Can we be done with this conversation?"

"We most certainly cannot." My mother puts her hands on her hips and stands up two inches taller than before, if that's even possible.

"Mrs. Kendrick," Christian's voice is hoarse from the doorway. "Do you mind if we just head back to the hotel? Julie and I have a lot to discuss and I'm starting to feel like I need to rest my knee."

My mother melts like butter. "Oh, of course. I'm so sorry, Christian. We'll call the car around right away." Then she turns back to me. "I'll deal with you later. I cannot believe the lengths you will go through to not meet suitors."

Something snaps in my chest. My tears stop flowing and the rage that I'd long kept locked away bubbles up like a volcano. "Mother, I don't want any suitors! I hate them all. I hate that you pick them for me and I hate sitting through your awful dinner parties just to have them all leave me. I don't know how you got it into your head that I wanted your help but I don't, okay? I just wanna be who I am and do what I please and not have to make up fake boyfriends to get you off my back. You don't like what's happening here, then take a look in the mirror because it's you that caused this."