Under Chateau Lights | Complete

39 | I Will Get Through This

Elodie gets me all the way to Quebec and offers to drive me out to the ranch for the shoot the next day, but I decline. It's time for me to try things on my own. Which means I have to rent a car and drive myself to my job.

None of that knowledge stops my heart from racing or my knuckles from turning white gripping the wheel as I meander through the snowy rural roads. Despite the fog and the cold and the windy path through the trees, I find the turn off and make it to the ranch.

And after all that work, it takes me less than an hour to photograph the house. The last few outside make my fingers go numb, but I have to stop and take a few of the surrounding woods. Finally, the owner catches up to me to sign off on my work.

"Thank you so much for all your help again," the owner says, shaking my hand. "I can't tell you how grateful I am for everything you've done."

"Oh, the payment is thanks enough."

He laughs at my attempted joke, and my shoulders relax.

"By the way, as you're my first official client for my new photography business, would you mind if I posted a picture or two on my social media? I'll make sure to include your realtor's name and contact info."

"You won't hear me complainin' about free press, young lady. Happy to have you use my property for whatever you'd like. Just glad you made the time to help me out. Thanks again."

"Any time. Well, any time I'm not busy." I catch myself before I accidentally commit to something that I shouldn't be doing.

"I'll take you up on that."

"I'm sure you will. If you're happy with the pictures I'll head back and touch them up with edits and then email them over to you?"

"That's perfect. You have my email?"

"Yes. No worries. Thanks again." I shake his hand and make my way back to the car, making a note about my social media posts.

Maybe it's the excitement of being paid, or my not wanting to drive all the way back into the city by myself, but my brain presents me with what I think is a fabulous idea.

Pulling up my picture app, I quickly check my surroundings to make sure I'm not in anyone's way. It looks like I have time.

"I think there's a picture from that day we went tobogganing or built a snowman." I don't know why I'm talking out loud like my car can hear me. The pictures fly by as I search back for the one I'm thinking of, praying there's no sign of Christmas in the background.

The pictures of my nieces and nephew and sisters and parents fly by, accompanied by snowmen, lights, and notable places around the city. There's one of Simone, too, which she would probably not like me for taking, but I took it anyway.

Finally, my eyes settle on the set of pictures I am looking for. Elodie took them while we were out tobogganing. Christian had picked me up and thrown me over his shoulder, spinning me around and then hugging me on the way down. A small pang shoots through my chest but I keep it under control, scrolling through the options.

There is one picture, which I can't believe I didn't look at sooner, with me half way down but clearly being lifted, and Christian is walking toward the camera.

It's perfect. If I post this, it'll be all over the news cycle by Monday, hopefully removing the damage I did when I crushed him. Well, at least the damage I did to his career. It doesn't undo anything I did between us, but maybe it will make him capable of being my friend again. One day.

Either way, it feels like the right thing to do. He doesn't need the mess of the media following him because of things I did. This is one thing I can fix. I just have to hope no one spots him in Toronto while I'm posting from Quebec. But it's worth the risk.