For You (DISCONTINUED)

Five

I was walking down the path that lead to my destiny. I haven't been to the treehouse since you died and right now, I felt like my chest was being dug out with shovels. This hurt me. It fucking hurt to know you weren't going to be waiting at our treehouse when I got there.

I wiped away more tears that had begun streaming down my face. I had smudged my eyeliner but did I give a fuck? No.

The path was dirt. Lots of dirt. There were trees everywhere. The only light I had was the light the moon was shedding. I'll admit, it was quite beautiful. Walking through the woods in the middle of the night, using only the moonlight to guide me. But that didn't change the fact that inside, I was screaming. I was thrashing and digging at my insides. It hurt to breathe.

I don't remember when I had begun singing, but when I finally realized I was, I was letting the chorus of Open Up Your Eyes by Daughtry spill from my heart. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love that song, but it didn't even sound like a song. I was sobbing and sniffling, barely letting the lyrics roll off my tongue. It was completely off tune, but I didn't care. That song explained exactly what I was feeling. I connected with every word that made up that song. I just needed to sing it.

Warm tears were streaming down my face. My eyes burned like hell and my vision, or what was left of it, was quite blurry. It was like trying to walk through a blizzard or.. Or find the sky in the thickest layer of fog that mankind has seen. Let's just say, my vision wasn't very successful.

I needed to sit. My head felt like an inflated hot air balloon and my nose was like Niagara Falls. Ew, I know.. But I needed to sit. So I did. Right in the muddle of the dirt path that, let me just inform you, was moist. Very moist. My ass was wet. So now, my head was being crushed by elephants, my nose was a freaking waterfall, and it looked like I pissed myself. I was a fucking hot mess.

I sat on the dirt path that was illuminated by the moonlight for a very, very long time. I sung Open Up Your Eyes a thousand times but the sound that left my throat probably broke glass. I had muffled my sobs down a bit but it didn't help that I had to sniffle ten times more to keep the fucking snot in my nose. So the song I was trying to sing.. It didn't sound like a song at all.

After a bit, I gathered myself and stood up. I wiped my face with my sleeves, getting rid of the tears that stained my cheeks. I brushed the dirt off my pants before continuing to walk down the path again. At least I felt a little better..

It wasn't too long after mg melt down that I saw the treehouse through the trees. It was starting to get lighter, as the sun began to rise. I wrapped my arms around myself after tugging down the sleeves of my oversized hoodie you got me a few months back.

I was closer to the treehouse now. It was larger than I remembered. It still had our names spray painted on the outside of the door and the tire swing still hung from a branch on the same tree. I smiled to myself as I saw the flower pot you made me for Valentine's day last year. There were purple orchids inside, you knew they were my favorite. The pot still sat where we put it, right next to the wooden ladder that led into the treehouse.

I now stood at the foot of the ladder, looking up to see the trap door that let you in. I took a deep breath and began to climb. It was like I was climbing the stairway to heaven. I knew you would be waiting for me at the top..

I'm scared Austin.