For You (DISCONTINUED)

Ten

I opened my eyes slowly, rolling over to keep the sun out of me eyes. Beside me, Kendra was snoring quietly. Rays of sunlight lit up her sleeping figure. Her short hair fell of her closed eyes. She was beautiful..

I sat up slowly, being sure not to make any noise. I wrapped Kendra's sweater tighter around me as I slid out of the small bed.

I walked over to the nook by the window. As I reached up and ran my fingers along the cracked glass, Kendra groaned behind me. Without realizing, a small smile spread across my lips.

I turned around and sat on the dusty cushion, with my back to the window. I was watching Kendra sleep peacefully when something caught my eye. The sunlight was hitting something on the desk across the room.

As quietly as I could, I walked over to the desk. My heart began racing as I saw that it was. Underneath a pike of miscellaneous things, out stuck the tip of a knife. The knife I grabbed from the kitchen before I left..

I found the handle and grabbed it, pulling it from the pile. The desk drawer squeaked as I slid it open.

"What are you doing?" Kendra's groggy voice made me whip around.

"Just looking through some things Austin left..." My hands gripped a knife tighter behind my back.

She gave me an apologetic look and rolled back over. I sighed in relief when I knew she wasn't going to push me any further. I spun back around on my heel and placed the knife in the back of the drawer. This will be its home until I'm ready for it.

The drawer squeaked once more as I slid it shut. I walked over to the bean bag in the corner and collapsed on it.

"How are you holding up?" Kendra proper herself up on her elbow, her eyes locking with mine.

I looked down at my hands. I didn't feel like talking about anything so I just shrugged as I played with the string on the sleeve of her sweater.

It was quiet for a while. The sun continued to rise, casting shadows onto the floor through the cracked glass.

I felt like the glass.. Cracked and continuing to be break until it gives in and shatters into a million pieces. Pieces that can't be out back together no matter how hard you try to get them to fit. I was the glass. Cracked.

"Come here." Kendra's voice pulled me back out of my thoughts. I did as I was told and moved slowly over to the bed she was laying on. She scooted over, her back to the edge behind her and lifted the blankets.

I climbed in and she gently placed the blankets over both of us. I could feel her eyes burning into me skull but I kept mine on the blankets.

After a few minutes, she grabbed me and pulled me close. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying my hardest to keep the tears back.

"Just let it out." She whispered against my head.

I did as I was told and let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding and a sob echoed though my throat. Even with my eyes shut tight, the tears found a way to spill out.

"Fuck." I breathed out quietly. She held me closer, rubbing my back.

In that moment I realized how broke I really was. I tried not to think about it too much, but I couldn't help it. It was itching to be noticed. I was broken.

The only thing keeping me from shattering all together was Kendra. I didn't deserve her after all the shit I did. I disappeared. I left her. But somehow, she looked past all of that. I don't know how she did it..

I glanced up at her, my eyes swollen and bloodshot. She didn't say anything, she didn't have to. Her eyes said it all. She cared. A lot. Much more than I deserved. How does that even happen?

She kissed the side of my head, never loosening her grip on me. She was holding the last pieces of me together. But I didn't really mind.

And we stayed like that, wrapped in each other's embrace, for hours.