A Perfectly Imperfect Love

Chapter Six; Murder.

Murder. First my father, now me. Maybe my father is bad. Maybe I'm bad. No. I'm not bad. Hugh deserved what he got. He was a bad person. Not me. Him. What kind of 'good' person would ever cheat on the person they claimed to love. I would have done anything for him. And he betrayed me in the worst way imaginable. It broke my heart. And nobody breaks Audrey Shadel's heart.

Maybe I did do the wrong thing. Maybe he didn't deserve to die. Maybe I could have dealt with what he did in some other way. My father always made any issues my siblings and I ran into disappear. Aways. But one day after my brother hurt that girl, he told us; "If you have a problem, figure out a healthy way to resolve it. Nothing messy like murder. Whatever you do I will be able to make it all go away. Unlimited resources. But murder, murder is serious. Whoever I entrust with dealing with murder will always have something to use against us. No matter who it is. If they are put in a situation to choose between our family and money, they'll choose money. Anyone would. It is my responsibility to take care of us, and I'm not willing to make that sacrifice. If anything ever goes in the direction of murder, you are on your own. Otherwise, come to me and I can make it better". I don't know why I remember that particular conversation so well. Maybe it's because subconsciously I knew that someday I would be in a situation where I needed to know that my father cant help me get out of it this time. I was right. And now, I'm on my own.

There I was. Standing over Hughs lifeless body. Kitchen knife in hand. Covered in his blood. So much blood. It was so overwhelming. I have never had to deal with anything on my own before. And now I have to deal with this. It was all too much. I just left him there. I had to. For now. I took off all of my clothes and took a shower to get rid of all the blood. Then I got changed and put the dirty clothes in the wash. I was about to leave but then I remembered that when I came back to deal with his body it would smell. Decomp is not a pretty process. So I turned down the cooling all the way, which should help with the stench. Then I walked out cool calm and collected and locked the door behind me. I didn't leave him there for too long. I just needed to clear my head. Compose an unbreakable plan. A plan to get away with murder.

After I left Hughs apartment I found myself stressed. Really really stressed. I had to use every last bit of my self-control not to call Dad or Lexi. I knew I wasn't going to be able to make a plan, a good plan, being so flustered. So I booked an appointment at the spa that afternoon. Just a two hour one. Nothing too big. I just needed to regroup. To totally relax. I knew I could do it. Make an unbreakable plan. I was smart. Very smart. But I wasn't thinking straight. And I needed to. If I was going to get away with murder. I had to. If I ever wanted to have my own power I needed to make him disappear. I had to do this on my own. And if I ran into anything big, Dad would help me. I know he will. He loves me. And no matter the cost, if I really really needed his help, he would give it to me. But it was risky. So I know I had to do it myself.