Finding You

Sigfig

     Work was as stressful as it always was, and not even the thought of Aku-no possibly picking me up could calm me down. Waiting tables for eight hours and being harassed by disgusting old drunk men never tickled my fancy. Everyone had been wearing out my name and my patience all night. The instant relief of clocking out and leaving through the employee exit was enough to kill a man. I had left ten minutes later than when I told Aku-no to pick me up, but I still didn't see his car. It was fine. I loved dirty taxi cabs and busy streets full of people who wouldn't think twice about running me over.
     "Kai." I turned around, feeling foolish for being so angry at him for not appearing right away. "I was behind you! Did you not see me? I should've parked closer to the door." I closed my eyes for a second before throwing on a fake smile and skipping over to him. "How was your shift?" He surprisingly opened his arms, and I fell right into them. It didn't mean anything. Friends hugged all the time. So do people in their first meeting. They do it all the time, right? He kissed my forehead before taking my bag from me, leading me to the car. Friends didn't do that.
     "It was tiring. My shift, I mean. I can't wait for tomorrow," I said, trying my best to keep my cool. I could cry at home. I could cry at home. I could cry at home. He turned around and flashed me a smile, sneakily grabbing my hand. He swung our intertwined hands,
     "I have a few things planned. You don't have anywhere to be like, all day, right?" Aku-no let go of my hand to open my car door, trying to see my expression and gauge my reaction. I averted my gaze, feeling the tears start to come on when I sat in the comfortable leather seats. He shut the door when the first tear fell. I'd be fine, I could hide it. I quickly wiped it on my jacket sleeve, clearing my throat that tried to close up on me.
     "I- uh, I'm free all tomorrow, yeah." My hands shook as I busied myself with tapping random words into my memos. Any word that came to mind to distract me. He pulled away from the bar. Another tear streamed down my cheek, but I couldn't get it. It'd be too obvious. Maybe he wouldn't notice. Neither of us spoke, but the atmosphere wasn't stiff or awkward. Did he notice my tear? What if he just didn't want to bother me? That was probably it. His music wasn't that loud but it hurt my ears. The bar was louder than normal, and I couldn't shake the feeling that I messed up more than usual. Did he pass my house? I didn't think so, but I didn't recognize the buildings we drove by. Soon enough, we had left the outskirts of the city and were driving towards his house. I didn't speak up in fear that my voice would be too choked up and squeaky.
      "Kai, look at me," he said, having pulled off into a random parking lot. I gripped my phone, not realizing I had been crying for the past while. "Hey," he whispered, gently touching my shoulder to get my attention.
     "I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm crying," I laughed, bouncing my leg while I wiped my cheeks, but that only made it worse. My laughter soon turned into choked up tears, which then became an embarrassing breakdown. "I'm sorry," I repeated, falling onto his chest as he rubbed my back. Aku-no kept a hand on the back of my head, cradling it lightly while I cried. He didn't stop comforting me until I started to calm down, and even then he still didn't want to let go. "This is humiliating," I groaned, pulling away from him when he dropped his arm from the back of my head. I tried to clean my face, but he tipped my chin up, looking over my flushed and tear-ridden skin.
      "You look beautiful," Aku-no muttered, blotting my cheeks with his shirt sleeve. I weakly smiled, dropping my head and opening my mouth to speak before he cut me off. "Don't apologize," he said, rubbing my hot skin with his cool thumb. "You shouldn't have to apologize for being alive." I smiled- a genuine, earnest smile. Maybe I did apologize a bit too much. He placed his left hand on the wheel, keeping his other one on my thigh. "Is it okay to go to my house?" I nodded, placing my hand on his,
       "Yeah. I didn't feel like being alone tonight. Thank you." My voice was shaky and quiet, barely above a whisper. I gripped his hand the whole way home, feeling his soft skin with my thumb. The car purred along the road, begging for me to close my eyes and calm down; I quickly gave in until I felt the car turn on that familiar curve into his large driveway. Even so, I didn't want to open my eyes.
       "We're here," he said softly, squeezing my thigh when he turned off his car. I groaned, rolling my head to the side. He laughed quietly, unbuckling his seat belt and moving in close to me, kissing my neck gently. "Kai..." he cooed, adjusting his hand to slide behind my back and grip my shoulder. I smiled, reluctantly opening my eyes.
     "I didn't wanna wake up," I said, leaning my head onto his. He unbuckled my seatbelt,
      "Let's get inside. I'll warm you up; your hands are freezing."