The Road To Her New Life

Going Back

I was strewn across Jmiere and Jy's lap as I munched on chocolate chip cookies. My blue gatorade sat in between my thighs as Jy repeatedly tapped my ankle because I wouldn't share my food with him.

Shawn shouted in frustration as he lost another game of foosball to Zae. Ke and Tae were sitting in the kitchen area talking about 'grown folks business'. Their words, not mine.

"Please give me food!" Jy begged for the 4th time. He was starting to get on my nerves. It's not my fault he wasn't smart enough to pack snacks.

His constant nagging reminded me of all the times we went on road trips and Benji would never shut his trap. I sighed as I looked out the window, feeling sadness creep into my chest.

I think Jy noticed this as he stopped bothering me and busied himself with something else. I closed my eyes and a few tears cascaded down my cheeks.

I internally rolled my eyes. I was sick of crying, all I did was cry. It made me feel weak, incapable, vulnerable. I didn't like it.

Jmiere pouted sympathetically as he wiped my tears. I buried my head into his abs, moving the gatorade and cookies to the side. He ran his fingers through my hair soothingly and I yawned.

I felt Jy take off my shoes and set them on the floor. "Go to sleep," he said. Jmiere continued to rake his fingers through my head and I closed my eyes trying to go to sleep.

"What do we do? She's crying one minute, then the next minute she's acting like a  little kid, and then, she's this sassy little diva with a reckless mouth who doesn't take any shit," I heard Jmiere whisper.

"She's grieving. People who grieve do this... I think. We just have to be there for her, no matter how many moods she has," Jy replied, making me smile softly.

I felt him flick my forehead, "stop eavesdropping and go to sleep, weirdo." I elbowed his gut in return but didn't say anything as I drifted off.

********

I woke up on a bed by myself. I looked out of the small window to see we were still on the road. I searched my pockets for my phone and checked the time. I had been sleeping for a solid 2 and a half hours.

We're almost there, my stomach was in knots. On one hand, I'm excited to see my friends again but I wasn't mentally prepared to be back in the house, just in the city period. Knowing that we've made memories almost everywhere, and everywhere I turned, I would be reminded of them.

I started crying again, making me groan. Even though I had just woken up, I was exhausted. My whole body was feeling weak. I probably needed to eat more than snacks. I turned around quickly but instantly regretted it when I felt a little dizzy. "Oh shit," I gasped as I held on to the counter. My legs were kinda wobbly as I stumbled out of the room, looking for everyone.

"Are you drunk?" Tae asked as I entered the kitchen section. They all stared at me. I stood there, rubbing the sleepiness out of my eye. "Noo, I'm dizzy and my head hurts, and somebody feed mee," I whined.