Stranger to stranger

Allegory

I found this letter 6 months ago. Monday, the next day, was his birthday. I wasn't even capable of wishing him a happy birthday or buying him a small cake. Two days later, I was invited to John's funeral. Sadly, my mom and I were the only ones there. Looks like he really was alone after all. A few tears rolled down my cheeks as I looked at his face. I know he's in a never ending sleep, but he looks just like he did everyday. The makeup artist did a good job on him. It was a great way for me to get closure about his death. I could get a finally healthy picture of him before he officially lived only in my head by memory. When I visited his grave. It felt unreal to see his name written on a grey stone. It's crazy how one day you're alive and the next you're not. Life is short and time should be appreciated by every second. I didn't know what to leave at his grave to honour his life. I thought a bouquet was too normal for him. I printed the picture I took of the beautiful painting at the art gallery. I cropped it so that we only see the painting in all of its beauty. I left it by his grave in the little black box he used to hide his pills. Don't worry, none of the pills are left in the box. I made sure to put everything in my neighbors garbage can. The box is still, today, next to his stone. I'm sure he would have loved it. For a few days after, I didn't know what to do with myself. I was lost in a void of boredness. But then, I found myself loving the things I used to do back when I was happy. I started to paint, to draw, to sing and to laugh at the most random things. I found myself staring at the stars once again, after all this time. I cried again, but not from sadness. I cried because I was happy I could finally enjoy the night sky without wishing to be somewhere else. I fell in peace with the fact that my brother was somewhere else than by my side. Above all, I know it isn't my time to leave yet. Once it is, I'll meet up with him again. Right now, I'm still looking at the stars just like I've always loved to. I'll keep doing it until I find myself magically being next to you. I'm sure I'll meet him again someday. I moved on with my life. All this story is in my past, but I cherish it with all my heart. My story continues with peace and silence. I learned to love myself a day at a time. It was a long process, but I made it. I will forever be grateful for how strong and patient I have been with this process. On another note, after those few days, I found out John left everything he had to me. I was shocked to read my name on his testament. I'm glad he finally saw me as a friend. He left me all of his belongings but, most importantly, the bookshop. Even months later, I am more than honoured to be the owner of his bookshop. I was shocked when I saw all the money that he put away. With all of it, I don't even have to work for the rest of my life. Money will never be a problem. I guess his book was a hit, but he didn't tell anyone. I'm not surprised he didn't overuse his money like usually rich people do. He was always non materialistic and humble in a way. If we dig a little deeper, I don't even think he wrote the book for the money after all. In my opinion, he wrote it to honour the love his wife and him shared. They deserve to be together, alive or dead. I never knew why he stopped taking his medication. Maybe it was to meet his wife again, maybe he thought he wouldn't make it out of his sickness, maybe he wasn't as happy as he was before or maybe he forgot everything he knew how to do, just like his wife. All I know is that we'll never really be sure what his reason was. To bring me comfort, I affirm to myself that, wherever he is, he is at peace. I fell in love with his concept of saving a life because he couldn't save another. I think that if it helped me, it could help another. And so, I rewrote all the letters with my handwriting. I made sure to change the name John by mine. I officially made myself the new helper of the adventurer. For the plan to come to life, I had to take John's job, of course. I now work at his bookshop every day. Of course, it's easier now that school is over. I missed the warm feeling of the summer sun but, in my mind, winter will always be my favorite season. I took the time to redecorate the shop a little bit. I thought it could use some more plants. I made sure to put back the book where I found it, in the same bookshelf it was when I first came through the glass doors. I also put back every letter I wrote back where they were meant to be found. I kept the ones John wrote at home where I can read them again if I need to. I'll forever be grateful with the way he voluntarily put time aside to write letters for me to find eventually. He didn't know if it would work, but he did it anyway. He is the most selfless person I know. He saved my life, and now it's time for me to do the same to another stranger. Yesterday, I was reading a book behind the counter of the bookshop. I heard a bell and a teen male coming in. Just like every other customer before, I welcomed him in by offering my help. He said he wasn't really looking for anything in particular. I didn't think much of it at first, until I saw him going through every book he could put his hands on. That's when I realized he was doing the exact same thing I did. I had a warm feeling in my stomach and it crawled to my heart. Here we go again. It's now the morning after, soon he'll be coming back to ask me about some information on the book, that's for sure. I'll make a new friend all over again. I'm so excited, I didn't sleep all night. I'm glad he chose to read the letter too. In a few months, he'll see it. Right now, he must be very confused. I'll be happy to help him and give him guidance, if he ever needs some. His opinion on life itself will be completely different by the time he ends this adventure. I know it, I've done it before. I thought it was unfortunate that only a few people at a time could experience the adventure I went through. With that thought, I wrote my own book. Yes, it's the one you're reading now. For the past six months, I've been writing my story to reach the biggest audience I could. Even though it's been a long time since I ended my experience, I remember it just like it was yesterday. I wanted to make John's wish a reality: change people's perspective. Who knows, maybe we helped you, fellow reader, with your opinion on the gift life really is. I wish for you to enjoy every second given to you because you deserve it. Your soul is young and full of life, use it. I hope you never get to feel worthless since it would only be a lie. If I made it through the tunnel, you would be able to do the same. With the knowledge we have now, you and I can rewrite our thoughts on life and its meaning. Let's both go back to the beginning of it all. We can erase everything and start over, together.

Life.
I can see it now. That night I let myself free. Free from this old voice inside my head. Free from everything that I used to be. Back then, the letters were leading me to someone who doesn't exist anymore. Now, I feel like I was looking for someone different than I was supposed to. This isn't about finding happiness or the stranger, but finding a reason for me to be. To find my reason, I have to find myself. With this treasure hunt, I found something that was in me all along. All of this, just to know that what I had in the beginning was enough. I only needed to believe I was. I am enough and proud to be me. Now, I can see that living is something you should be proud of too. Life is something that should be cherished and appreciated in all of its phases. After all, everything has some bad and some good, just like you and me. You can only choose to focus on the bad. With that in mind, live your life to the fullest. You have nothing to lose. Life was made for everyone, without exception. And if you think it wasn't meant for you, who cares. You still have a life, so live it. Do it for yourself with the mentality that you deserve the best, only because it's purely true. If you can't live for yourself, do it for others. Talk for the mute, listen for the deaf, observe for the blind and grow old for the ones who died too young. Decide to live for the ones that couldn't because you can and will. I could have started to live mine earlier, but I didn't. I regret satisfying myself with only surviving. If you live in fear and regret, you live in the dark. All this time, I have been wrong about the treasure that living is. Don't make the same mistake I did. I later learned that this life of ours is pure allegory: a story revealing a hidden message, if you listen carefully. To find it, you have to observe every sign of beauty. Only you can choose where your point of view should be.

PS: A message from stranger to stranger.

With thoughts of a better future for both of us,

Alaeha.