The Past Haunts us- BOOK TWO

Chapter 20: Grief

I'd suggest getting a box of Kleenex if you get emotional easily and not read this while wearing washable makeup. I also apologize for what you're going to read. I'm feeling poetic so try reading this in a poetic style. I'm sorry.

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I was getting ready to leave my apartment when the phone rang, "Hello?" I answered.

"Melinda? Hi." Phil.

I smiled, "Phil? What's up?"

"Uh, nothing. I just- I wanted to hear your voice once more."

"Wha- is everything okay?"

"Yes, everything's good. I just- I'm on the helicarrier right now."

"Ok."

"I just- if something goes wrong,-"

"Phil, don't."

"I just want you to know what you mean to me, Mel."

"I know. Me too."

Goodbye, Melinda." I could hear the smile.

"Goodbye, Phil. Be careful." I whispered.

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I was stapling a stack of documents when my office door opened and closed. Every operative in the area looked my way but quickly looked away when I looked up.

I saw her standing in the room with the door shut and I pulled myself up from the chair and walked to her.

"Melinda, something happened." Her voice was barely a whisper. My breath hitched as I thought of everything that could've happened.

"Wha- What's wrong?"

"He's gone, May." She whispered loud enough for me to hear.

"Wha-" I felt my breath fasten and my knees buckle as I fell to the ground. He can't be gone yet. Not yet.

I don't know how long I sat on the ground sobbing but when I got a hold of myself, I found Maria's arms wrapped around me.

I could hear the whispers outside as Maria left the room.

I tried to clean my face and walked to the washroom.

A lot of agents noticed the tears anyway, they probably heard about his death but most of them didn't know our relationship. I reached the washroom and pulled out my pills. Carefully, taking one out with shaky hands, I swallowed it.
I washed my face and luckily, there wasn't anyone there.

Walking back to the office was tough, I heard agents' whispering.

'She's the Cavalry.'

'They were best friends.'

But the one had hit the hardest was, 'It was her fault.'

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It had been a week since she received the news of his death. A week since her best friend died. A week since she fell into depression. That's how many days she cried herself to sleep. A week. That's how long it took for Melinda May to become emotionless again.

She was standing at his funeral right now. To everyone around her, she seemed stoic because the only person who could've known was being buried.

"He was loved by everyone around him. He was a legend." They used 'was' to describe him. "He was a people person and yet, his favourite person wasn't."

The guests looked around in confusion, to them, Melinda May came to the funeral to show respect and his favourite person was his girlfriend. The cellist and extrovert, Audrey Nathan.

"Melinda May." Fury said her name with what nobody ever heard from him, sympathy.

All eyes stared at the Asian women who stoically stood behind everyone else.

"Mel?" Maria whispered.

Melinda looked up with unshed tears and walked to the front. She felt everyone's gaze on her but didn't lift her own from the ground she walked on.

She felt a squeeze on her shoulder, "Phil was one of the best men I met. Right after my own father. He- people often thought we could never be friends. Honestly, even we thought so. He was the nerd and I was the rebel." She softly smiled, "It's hard to believe he's gone. It feels like yesterday that he was ranting on about meeting Captain America or being on the helicarrier with the Avengers. He said, Mel, you'd love it. You could fight alongside Nat and Clint. It'll be like the old days.' He-" her voice quivered, "I pushed him away. More than once. He didn't falter and leave. He'd sneak into my apartment and leave me home cooked meals so I don't bring the whole building down." She took a breath and looked up with a tear sliding down her cheek but a smile nonetheless , "He wouldn't like for us to be upset over his own - his demise as some would say. He'll be remembered." She took a deep breath and walked back to her spot on the back. Maria gave her a hug and, Natasha and Clint gave her a sympathetic nod. The others stood there with sorrowful eyes.

She was the last one to leave that evening, and the first one to arrive. She was the last one to place her flower and the last one to say goodbye.

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Uhm... I'm sorry. Happy Chapter coming up soon. I PROMISE.