I HATE YOU'- SEQUEL 2/3

CHAPTER TWO

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CHAPTER TWO

HARRY

„Louis, what is wrong with you?"

We were on our way to our car to drive back home and I was following Louis who was walking infront of me.

„Nothing." He mumbled.

„Sure, Nothing! You were behaving so strange the whole day and now at my Dad's too! What the fuck is wrong?! Tell me!"

Louis shook his head.

„Tell me!" I hissed, grabbing his arm.

I regretted it right away when he started screaming and looked up at me, terrified.

I let go of him quickly.

„Fuck, Louis! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to-"

„You always say you didn't mean to! You know that I hate beeing touched and specifically unexpted from behind!"

Louis pulled his arm away and took a few steps away.

I shook my head.

„Then tell me what is wrong with you! I am not asking for more! Just tell me why you're behaving so strange today! Is it me? Did I do something? Is it Dad? Is it Danielle? Is it Mike?? Tell me! Fucking tell me!"

„I'm not fucking used to telling someone how I am really feeling, okay?! I never had to and I- Aargh! Why would you even care Harry?! No one ever cared how I was really feeling! No one! Fucking no one! Except you!"

„Louis, listen to me: I care because I am your boyfriend! It's normal to care about how the other one is feeling! I did it before we were in a open realationship also because I wanted to know you were safe! I loved you always, Louis! I know you're not used to having other care about you but you have to start to get used now because I am not your abusive Dad or your dreamy mother who doesn't recognize her son was feeling shit too! I care about you because I love you! You don't know what that even means, do you?! I don't know what was wrong with your Mom to believe that this man who was beating her and you and that was raping you both, would love her! She must be completely high on drugs or I don't know! If I were you I'm sure, I wouln't ever forgive her! She could have called for help years ago before it became such a big thing and you were involved! What of a mother would watch her own man, beating and raping her own son without doing anything?!"

„She didn't just watched! Mom knew that she hadn't had a chance than to watch him do! She wasn't able to do anything! It would have always made it worse and she wanted to protect me from Dad everytime! It didn't always work but she tried! She was and is a good Mom! How dare are you judging her like that?! She fucking was and is an amazing Mom!"

Louis seemed to be shocked of himself that he was yelling so much and he took another few steps away from me.

„And I do know what love is! Because I love you! I just can't open up yet as you can! You haven't had a past where no one ever asked for the truth, if you are really fine or not, no! Mom did ask me but I knew she wasn't listening anyways! She had enough to do with herself! As now still! And it won't ever change! But she was there for me! She didn't did all the things normal mothers would do with their kids but she did the best she could! I understood her a lot times when I asked her if she'd go to the playground with me when I was younger and found her crying in the living room! I always cuddled against her to be near her and she hugged me back and told me she was fine! I always promised her that it'd be alright again one day! She didn't believe me! She thought Dad loved her, loved me, loved us! She only realized it wasn't like that when Dad wanted to shoot me the day he was arrested in our apartment! You were there, Harry! That day, she finally realized!"

Blurry memories of that moment rushed through my head and I shook my head, crossing my arms infront of my chest.

„Louis, just tell me what is going on! I don't want to start a fight with you now so please: tell me why you were so scared and absent! Please!"

Louis shook his head. „You don't understand it, Harry!"

„I don't understand?! Okay, Yeah, maybe you are right! Because I really don't understand! I just asked you if you what was wrong with you and you won't answer me! Why?! Why?! Tell me!"

Louis shook his head, shaking and scared.

„No. No. Please, leave me alone."

„Louis, you can't tell me to leave you alone! We have to drive home together in one car!"

He laughed out, voice croaky.

„I don't want to drive with you in one car. You yelled at me."

I laughed out.

„I yelled at you because I don't fucking understand what is wrong with you! Why won't you tell me?! Why?! What is the reason! You can tell me anything!"

„Because it's my problem, not yours! Give me some more freedom! I want to have my own secrets! Privacy!"

„Your own secrets! Louis, you are in a relationship with me! I respect your freedom and privacy and everything but- Why won't you tell me?! I could help you!"

„Because I want to keep it by myself! Why don't you understand that?!"

I gasped for air when I felt Louis grabbing the car key out of my hand and opening the car doors.

„Fine." I scuffed.

-

The drive was silent and Louis didn't spoke a single word, instead he left the car at first, slammed his door shut, walking away.

I hurried getting out the car and followed him.

„Where are you going?" I asked him, panting from the running.

Louis bite his lip. „I want to be alone for a few minutes."

I was about to protest as he added a small „Please." and I gulped.

„Okay. I'll be waiting at home."

Where the hell was he?!

I was already worrying when the door opened and I breathed out in relief.

„Never do that again, please! I was already worried that you-"

Louis threw himself onto me and cried in my shirt.

I closed my eyes for a second before pulling him closer to me, hugging him and soothing him.

„Shhhhhh, it's alright, Lou. It's alright. It's alright, Lou-Bear. I'm here. It's fine."

Louis shook his head, sobbing.
„I'm so sorry, Harry! I didn't mean to yell at you! I was just so angry and-"

„I'm sorry too, it was all my fault! I shouldn't have forced you to telling me everything! It was wrong to do that, you're right! You want your privacy and freedom and it's right asking for that! I'm so sorry for disrespecting that! I really didn't mean to! I'm so sorry, Lou! Impossibly sorry!"

Louis quietly sobbed in the fabric of my shirt.

„I hate when you are calling me, Lou-Bear."

I smiled a bit. „I know."

-

„I love you, Louis."

Louis bite his lip. „I- I love you too Harry."

He pressed himself nearer onto me.

„You are the best. The fucking best."

-

🎶 JUST GONNA STAND THERE AND WATCH ME BURN
BUT THAT'S ALRIGHT, BECAUSE I LIKE THE WAY IT HURTS
JUST GONNA STAND THERE AND HEAR ME CRY
BUT THAT'S ALRIGHT, BECAUSE I LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE
I LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE 🎶