They Think They Know Who I Am

The Predator Part II

October 18th

I couldn't follow through with it after that. I had no idea she felt that way, almost regretted everything. Jackie cried once the recording was over. Not a loud or sad cry nor angry or disgusted, rather a low whimper and sob. Her heavy breathing wasn't making anything better, it made me feel the need to protect her, to cuddle her, to love her. I reached to hug her back, she shuddered at my touch but did not resist. We were quiet for a while. I caressed her head, her hair, her body. I kissed and bit her ear, I wanted to show my love, prove I'm not just some asshole fixated with her. Pains me to think I could've had her if I had just waited for her to confess. I stopped caressing her to play another song, Polly. I mentioned loving this song before, still have it taped to my journal. I returned to hug Jackie as the beauty played. I lifted her body to the gurney where she laid with her back to me, I hugged her. As I licked her wounds, her open sores. I cleaned her face, all rosy from the beating and painted with blood which I licked clean. Seeing her that way gave me a greater pleasure than sex would've. Cleaning her wounds gave me a sense of utility, her face gave me a reason to protect her. The song was nearly over and I had already cleaned her face and body; wasn't easy as she moved any time I touched her chest or any place that wasn't her face. I sang alongside Kurt throughout the song to calm her down, including the guitar solo which I hummed, tuu tu tu tu tu, tu-tu tu-tu,I might've just made her nervous. By the end I had her bandaged. I turned off Nevermind before Territorial Pissings played which would not have been an appropriate song to play at the time. Wasn't sure what to do next but to lay with Jackie. I rested my head on her shoulder and she finally spoke to me.

"Why are you being good now?"

I had no answer. I defaulted to saying I love you, made her fill with rage and yet she retained a calm, monotone voice throughout our conversation. "Jackie.." I whispered, she only said, "Don't say my name." I continued to caress her face and play with her hair; she did not object. "I should've asked. I'm desperate to be with you. No one else understands. I didn't want to lose my chance with you, rushed everything. I wanted to spend my last moments with you." I said. I made it seem like I wanted to commit suicide. Maybe I do now, did then, might as well do it. I've got nothing more to give. I wasn't going to that day, at least I hadn't planned it. I did think about it after I saw what I did to Jackie. Jackie looked at me for the first time in a while. Our eyes met and I was both surprised and nervous as she rapidly turned her head towards me with that blank expression of hers. I was too fazed to say anything so we stared at each other's faces until Jackie asked, "why do you switch moods this way?" Her face showed disdain and pity for me. Disgusted at me, she was right anyway. I couldn't say anything so I just breathed heavily. Unexpectedly, she wrapped her arms around me, she actually hugged me. I was experiencing so many emotions, mainly joy and amazement. That was until she whispered, "Wish you were committing suicide..." Her wisp and tone so cold, so simply mischievous, so dark and lovely at once; I could feel her smile. Her words had the opposite effect on me. I wasn't sad I was happy, I felt a surge of joy overcome me. Lust and avidity gave me the confidence to hug her as well. "I love you," I whispered. I took her arms off my shoulders and kissed her beautifully mangled face. I held on to her wrists so she wouldn't be able to levy off. I kissed her sweet bloody lips for a long time, I lost track and I don't recall Jackie ever resisting. We must've made out for over 10 or so minutes though I don't remember much of anything at all. Just lived the moment I guess, loved every moment of it; finally stopped. Between heavy breaths, staring into her eyes, and the lovely warmth of her flushed skin against mine, I could feel heaven upon me. I kissed Jackie again, this time getting on top of her. She wasn't resisting neither was she complaining, just seemed sad, distraught, on the verge of tears. Something I love about her is her will. I admire her for not crying, I praised her for that; I was genuine. Jackie wasn't amused but turned to me and softly said, " Do What Thou Wilt." I smiled and laughed off, "Crowley" loved her reference. I kissed her neck as she laid motionless. I spiraled further down to kiss her exposed breasts, left lovely bites contrasting her pale skin with red. I play with her nipples for a while. Twist, bite, kiss. Jackie was quiet, too quiet. My dick was throbbing and she could of course feel it. I was ready. I look into her eyes and said, "I love you. I'm offering myself to you. I want this to be special... for both of us. Enjoy it please, I don't want you to cry, I know you love me as much as I do." I bit my lip, something I now see as cringe; kissed her. I shook as I was about to insert my dick inside Jackie. I convinced myself I was ready, I see I probably wasn't. Not sure if I should feel good or bad now. I thought to not think at all and just go for it. I choked her, bit her lower lip, and thrusted inside. I let out a soft moan followed by heavy breaths as I was not ready to feel all her strength and hatred around my dick. I was inside, finally, after all my fantasies. I felt her vagina clamp around me like a vice. I couldn't move, felt if I did I'd cum. I stared into her eyes for a few seconds, a look of contempt and sadness is what she gave me. Luckily, no tears. I began by slowly lifting my body up which made my dick ache with pleasure. Wasn't sure I'd last but I went back in; kept going despite all the difficulty I had. I kept moaning impulsively and I wasn't sure I should be, that's something only girls seem to do but I told myself I should be enjoying the moment so I kept going. I tried to look at Jackie while I made love to her but she wouldn't turn to look at me. She stared blankly to her right. I tried to get her to look at me but she wouldn't. I caressed her face to get her to turn, nothing. She wasn't saying anything and her face showed her iron will. It seemed nothing could phase her. I admire her for it, being forced into this and somehow pretending it's not happening, she just wanted it to be done. Maybe she was enjoying it. I like to run with that story, hate to think she resented me the entire time. I kept going at it for a while not sure how long but I loved every moment of it. She's so warm, tender, and tight. It was my first time, I didn't know what to expect but I didn't think it'd be this tight, I asked Jackie if she was a virgin. She looked me for a while, she hadn't since we started. She gave another one of her pitiful, sad looks of disgust, looked away and said, "not anymore." I had to stop for a while, pulled out and smiled. I hugged her for I was happy we'd lost our virginity to each other. Kissed her, took another ride, pleased myself. Must've been there a while, my legs were tired from thrusting inside her so I flipped her over. Her round ass before my eyes, my hand choking her neck, and my lips on her back. I gave Jackie several love bites followed by me pounding inside her warm pussy. I kept at it for another while, lost so much time but I didn't care because I love her so much it makes me sick. After so many thrusts, so much love shared, so much happiness, I came inside Jackie. Her pussy, being so tight, filled with my cum. I could feel it drip even as I kept cumming. I finished with a smile being so proud of what I've done. Smiled down and stared into Jackie's beautiful eyes, kissed her for the last time. It was a long one, pure love behind my motive. The gurney was filthy afterwards and her clothes thrown about. I picked up her panties giving them a whiff. I put them back on her, she wasn't moving so I had to move her myself to dress her. Left her standing so I put her shirt on her like a mannequin. Her fishnets were torn to shit so I ripped off the sleeves and slip them on her, gave her a nice grunge look. I laid her down again to put her shorts on, she whimpered again but stopped after I reassured her I was just dressing her. I slipped on her socks and shoes and asked her to wait until I packed her stuff. Wasn't long but I paused for a bit when I grabbed the tape of her, confessing. I just shrugged it off but kept it. With that in my pocket and her other stuff packed, I opened the door. We left the ambulance, the lights were on down her but from what I could see of the outside it was around the afternoon. Worst of all, there were people around. None saw us but I was worried they'd find Barnes. I handed Jackie her bag and tightly held both of her hands; turning to face her. I felt genuine emotion as I told her to run home. I didn't want her to be caught and seen as my accomplice but I also didn't want her to be seen as my victim. I gave Jackie a final hug, last I would give her. I told her to run after that but she didn't, she was confused, scared. She started stuttering something along the lines of, "what the fuck" and "I can't do this" I wasn't sure if she was aware of anything going on. I calmed her down and told her how much she meant to me, how much I love her, how much I appreciate her being in my life. Her face turned red but her expression said, "go fuck yourself." I could tell she resents me but doesn't have the heart to say it, deep down I she loves me. I finally said goodbye and ran. I didn't want to look back. Scooped my clothes and entered the elevator. No one saw the naked kid sprinting into the elevator, they were busy as I'd find thereafter. I noticed the blood stain was just that, a stain. Seems it had already been cleaned by someone which is when I worried but didn't it didn't faze me. I dressed in Fatty's fine leather duster and my black skinny jeans and boots. I didn't have a shirt and I wasn't about to wear my gown again, wouldn't want to get some undiscovered infection. I just buttoned the duster and holstered my gun inside it, I was ready to walk out. I reached my floor. The floor where it all started. No one. It was empty though I could hear people in the distance. I wasn't concerned about that nor anything, I just had to find the room numbers of Sid, June, and Toni. Wasn't sure how or where to look but I remembered, Nurse Bonham. I didn't know where she would be but I knew she was still here. My first thought was to use the call button in my room to alert her but as I got there I noticed something. My room was fine. It didn't seem right. Someone must've found Fatty and placed the entire hospital under lockdown but nothing happened in the meantime. My instinct told me Glassy could be hiding there for all I know. I remember Nurse Bonham went to check out what happened, it'd been hours, she didn't tell anyone about Fatty. I wondered then if his body was still there. Then I thought about Glassy again. He had to have come looking for Fatty after all this time. I decided to walk into my room, just out of curiosity. Gun raised, creaking door. A faint smell of decay could be felt, faint. I covered my nose regardless and waltzed in gun raised. His body was still there, and so was Glassy's. Bound and gagged, he'd fallen asleep or maybe he was drugged. I believed then he was as there was no way a trained, fit cop like him could remain tied up for this long. I noticed the smell was faint due to a large fan blowing air from the room out through the window. After putting everything together I ran for the nurse call button. There was a note.