cease to begin [on hold]

lilies of courage

grasping onto lilies of courage.
emerging from crevices of hate
i again slip,
falling into these depths of self loathe,
loosing those mere lilies of mine.

when will i get them again?
for i've treasured 'em into my mind
and nurtured 'em with full sunlight,
but only wilted ones are left
soon they'll too bid me goodbyes.

just inches away they're soaring
out of my grip nears seas of fright.
vain attempts of holding 'em again
is all i can try,
for those are delicate to find.

when will i get them again?
when will i find courage to fearlessly cry;
to rise higher than those liles,
catching 'em to never leave me behind.

a/n:
symbolism of lilies here is courage. a poem on how one has lost the courage to fearlessly do anything and the vain attempts trying to get it back.