It had been a week since you told the pogues about the pregnancy and about Rafe. You'd spent most of the week at the Chateau with John B because you weren't ready to face your mother yet and John B didn't care if you stayed with him. Rafe had tried to contact you. He'd left texts and calls but you never answered. You weren't ready to face him yet either.
You wrapped yourself in one of the blankets and stepped onto the back porch, walking down to the dock. It was nighttime. The night was warm but there was a chill in the wind and the sky was clear, the stars on full display. You pulled the blanket tighter around your arms as you admired the stars.
"Hey." John B says, walking up next to you. He bumps his shoulder against yours and puts his hands in his pockets.
"Hey," you give a small smile.
"You okay?"
You nod, "I'm okay.. just thinking." You look back out at the marsh, "Thinking about how much I fucked up."
"hey come on Malwina. You made a mistake, it's okay." He pulls his hand out of his pocket and puts his arm around you, "You know me and the pogues are going to be by your side the entire time."
Your eyes started to swell with tears, "Rafe doesn't even know yet and I don't even know if I want him to know." You look up at John B, "He was high that night I went by his house and he was a completely different person. I mean.. the look in his eyes was not the Rafe I came to know and love."
His arm slowly drops from your waist, "Yeah well he's a tool, Malwina. Always has been." He turns to look at you, "woah woah woah, you love him? I thought this was just a fling you two had."
"I'm not sure, John B. It was a fling at first but then he started taking me on those dates and our time together was amazing. I mean he's a whole different person around me. He's sweet and caring. He thought out the dates we went on and we laughed the whole time. But I guess I didn't mean that much to him as he did to me."
"yeah and he was too embarrassed to be seen with you that he would drive 2 hours away so you two wouldn't be seen by someone."
"We agreed on that together. You can't hold that over him."
"Malwina, he's a drug addict now. You don't need to be around that and neither does your baby.."
"When did it become you could tell me what to do? You're supposed to be my friend. You're supposed to support me." You angrily wipe a tear from your face, "Damn hormones!"
He sighs, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to come out like that. I just... you deserve the best. I want the best for you and Rafe just isn't it. I mean you deserve someone who would be proud to show you off and not one who's scared about what people would think. You deserve someone who's going to support you and someone to love you for you. You deserve the damn world, Malwina."
"Yeah and who would that be John B?" You throw your hands up in the air, still gripping onto the blanket, "I'm a pogue. Someone from nothing, no one is going to want to love me! Especially, now that I'm carrying Rafe Cameron's baby."
"Damn it, me, Malwina! I want to love you. I do love you and I always have."
Your eyes are wide as you stare at your best friend. He just confessed his love to you. When the fuck did this happen? Did you love him back? or did you love Rafe? "John B..." you whisper.
He shakes his head, "I'm sorry. I-I shouldn't have said anything.. I just fucked up." He runs his hands through his hair, " Please don't tell me I messed up our friendship and made it awkward."
"No, no. It's okay." You shake your head and take a step closer, taking your hand in his, "I'm glad you told me." You give his hand a squeeze, "I just.. need time to think about this. Okay? I don't want something to happen and then we hate each other. Plus, you know Kie's rule.."
"Yeah yeah no pogue on pogue smacking." He mumbles.
"Give me time to think. It's been a rough week."
He nods, looking down at your hands and rubbing his thumb over the top of yours, "I can give you that." He then looks back up at you, "Anything you need."
❦ ❦
You could feel eyes on you and hear the whispers, as you walked through the crowd at the Boneyard to find the rest of the pogues. Guess word traveled fast. You knew sooner or later, it would make it back to Rafe. You kept your head down, finally spotting the pogues by one of the bonfires.
"Malwina!" They yelled in unison.
You smiled, "Hey guys."
John B was first to stand from his seat, smiling at you, "You can take my seat."
You blushed and took a seat and he sat next to your legs in the sand. It had been a couple days since he confessed his love for you. You'd stayed at your house since then so you could think things over and you thought you had a decision.
There was a little commotion in the crowd and soon it was Rafe, Topper and Kelce pushing through the crowd, standing in front of you. "Malwina, is it true?" Rafe rounded the bonfire to you.
You were speechless. You could see the crowd had turned their attention to the two of you, you slowly stood, "I-"
"Is it fucking true?! Are you pregnant?!" He snapped, his hand latching onto your arm.
John B was up within seconds, JJ and Pope at your side.
"Let go of her Rafe." John B warned.
"Don't be starting shit, Cameron." JJ points his finger at Rafe.
You could see Rafe's eyes were red and dilated, like that night you stopped at his house. John B and JJ's warning only angered Rafe even more, his hand tightening. You whimpered in pain, "Rafe, you're hurting me."
That's when John B snapped. He punched Rafe as hard as he could and he stumbled back into Topper and Kelce. Rafe lunged at John B, tackling him into the sand. Kie grabbed your shoulder's and pulled you away from the boys. The two rolled in the sand, each getting a few punches in and then the other getting the upper hand. "Both of you stop!" You looked at JJ and Pope, "do something!"
As JJ and Pope went for Rafe, Topper and Kelce intervened, the four of them now punching at each other.
"Stop! All of you stop!" You watched as Rafe tackled John B into the water and began holding him underwater. You were panicked, no one was stepping in to help, the people surrounding the fights were just egging them on, "Fight! Fight! Fight!" Looking around frantically you saw JJ's bookbag in the sand. Dropping to your knees, you dug through it and found what you were looking for. You rushed back to John B and Rafe, who still had a hold of John B in the water, you put the gun to the back of Rafe's head.
Rafe's hands immediately let go of John B and went to his side in surrender, "Malwina, put the gun down."
"Get off him." Your hands were shaking, but you kept the gun firmly pressed against the back of Rafe's skull.
"Okay okay..." Rafe slowly stood, facing you, his hands still up at his sides in surrender, "Just put the gun down, Malwina."
"Malwina put the gun down!" you heard Kie yell. When you glanced at Kie, Rafe used it to his advantage and grabbed the gun from your grip, but you'd turned your attention back to him and the two of you began fighting over the gun and that's when a gunshot rang through the beach.
❦ ❦
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