Almost every night I end up staring at nothing, and just re-living all the bad things that have happened in my life. I just break down and lose myself completely. Most of the time throughout the day, I'm somewhat in control of my feelings, but that doesn't mean I'm not still completely breaking down on the inside. I usually contain it throughout the day, and it just builds up over and over through the whole day, and then when I'm alone at night with my thoughts, I just collapse, I'll cry for hours, re-living every last detail of the tragedies that have occurred throughout my life. I'll re-live every last emotion that I felt when the situation originally happened, I'll go through every thought that I had. I suffer through it all over again almost every night.
