Time gone by

Please

It's been an hour since lily was wheeled away and we haven't heard anything. I'm pacing the floor of the waiting area. I'm surprised there isn't a hole where I'm been walking. Chris is still sat in the chair watching me walk, he is being amazing and really helping me through this. I haven't been in this hospital since Eric died and it's hard to be here but I need to be for Lily's sake.
"Abbie. Come and sit down please?"
"I can't chris, what if something happens?"
"Hey, don't say that okay. She is going to be just fine and so is that baby"
He stands up and pulls me into a hug, no matter what has happened with us, he is my safe place.
"Abbie?"
I turn and see Seb in front of me "Seb? OMG is everyone okay?"
"Lily is okay, she lost a lot of blood but she is okay. She is a sleep right now and they aren't sure when she will wake up"
"Oh Seb" I put my arms around him "what about the baby?"
"The baby is okay. He is resting in the nic u at the moment but he is strong and healthy"
"He?"
"Yeah. I have a son"
I smile and pull him in for a hug. I can't believe I'm an auntie.

We all go to see lily, we feel like seeing the baby before she does wouldn't be right. I sit next to her bed and hold her hand. Chris offers to go and get coffees and seb goes with him.
"Lily, come on please wake up. You have a beautiful baby boy. He needs his mamma please"
After a little while the boys come back and we all just sit and wait. Seb goes to the baby for a while and it's just me and chris with lily. He grabs my hand "she is going to wake up okay"
I nod "she has too."
I can feel him rubbing his thumb across my knuckles.
"Chris, I'm sorry for skipping out on you"
"I understood. You had every right to be angry with me Abbie. I was a jerk. I was scared that you still wouldn't be ready when you saw me again. I knew before I left that I loved you and I was scared to get my heart broken. It's stupid and I should have just spoken to you. But please know that girl. She meant nothing okay. She was a PR stunt that is it. I love you no one else"
"I wish you would have told me all of that months ago."
"I know I'm sorry. But what happened to me was not your fault okay. It was a stupid accident and the man who caused it is in jail. It had nothing to do with you"
"But I could have spoken to you that night, maybe if I had you wouldn't....."
"Hey, no okay. Not your fault. I'm just sorry, I know seeing me like that must have caused you pain because of Eric"
"Chris....yeah seeing you like that gave me flashbacks but it caused me pain because I love you so much. I hated seeing you in that bed not knowing if you were going to wake up or not."
"You still love me?"
"Of course I do. I never stopped."
"Awww ain't you too cute" we both turn our heads and see lily looking at us.
"Omg lily!!!" I cuddle her and she winces "sorry"
"I'll go get Seb"
"Are you okay?"
"Sore and thirsty. Where's my baby?"
"Here is some water and your baby...."
"Is right here" we look towards the door and Seb walks in holding the baby. Lily looks and starts crying "that's our baby" and seb nods, tears rolling down his cheek too "yes baby. He is"
"He?" Seb nods "can I hold him?"
"Of course" Seb hands him to her and she snuggles him close, Seb sits at the side and cuddles both of them "I thought I lost you"
"I'm not going anywhere baby" Seb kissed her on the head. I can feel the tears streaming down my cheeks. "He is so cute. What's his name"
"Do you want to hold him?"
I nod and she hands him to me "his name is Eric David Stan"
I look up and smile "after Eric and your dad?"
"Yeah" we are both crying so much "that's beautiful. They would have loved it"
I wipe some of my tears away "hello Eric, I'm your auntie Abbie and I'm going to spoil you so much." Seb and lily laugh and chris comes over to me, he places a hand on my shoulder and looks down at baby Eric.
"He is definitely cute, takes after lily of course"
"Funny man"
"Do you want to hold him?" I ask chris and he nods yes. I delicately hand him to chris and he instantly starts to tear up. I look at this man and realise I couldn't possibly love him more.

Lily gets checked out and she is okay. She has to stay in the hospital for a while but her and baby are good. Me and chris say our goodbyes and head to the car. When we get in I realise I don't have anywhere to stay. I supposed I can crash at Seb and Lily's.
"Where you staying tonight?"
"Erm....not sure. Probably just crash on Seb and Lily's couch but I don't have a key"
"Don't be silly, come to mine okay. I have a spare room"
"Chris...."
"No arguments okay please"
"Okay but we need to pop to Lily's because of Ellie. She can't be left alone. Do you have a key"
"Yeah I do. I'll run in and grab it"
Chris jumps out and grabs the key and we quickly go to sebs to get Ellie. She is so excited to see me and she has grown so much. We take her back to Chris's and she settles down straight away.
"So do you want a drink or just want to go straight to bed?"
"Straight to bed I think, I'm still on England time at the moment"
"Of course"
We walk upstairs and he hoovers outside the spare room door. He says goodnight and goes to walk away. I grab his hand "chris?"
"Yeah?"
"Can I sleep with you tonight? Your arms are my safe place and I need to feel safe right now"
He smiles "of course"
We head into his room and settle down into bed. He gets me a large T-shirt to wear. I settle on his chest and listen to him breathe.
"Goodnight Abbie" he says cuddling me close
"Goodnight chris"