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Something painful hung in the dark night air; a sad atmosphere that wrapped me up faster than I could react. It was an unusual feeling that welled up from my chest, plunging the actual thoughts into a dark black, while my boyfriend came to my mind - more my ex-boyfriend.
He was probably already sharing a bed with his new girlfriend. A thought that animated me to take another drag from my cigarette. After all, he had still done me the honor of breaking up with me before jumping into the next relationship with already two months before I would painfully find out myself.
No, he was not a cheater.
A sad smile curled up on my lips before I tried to swallow the dark thoughts and rather concentrate on my route ahead. My destination: the roof of the new building in which a good friend of mine lived.
I had no intention of making a run for it, preferring to enjoy the vibe of being there at this hour while overlooking everything. Could feel powerful for once in my life, as if everyone would be inferior to me.
Earlier, I had held the cell phone against my ear and inquired if she wanted to join me in enjoying the silence and atmosphere while we looked down many feet above the sea of lights on the many houses when we were at the top.
Tiredly, I dragged myself up all the stairs before a front door opened, revealing Nayeon through the sparse light as she emerged from the small apartment.
"Hey," she murmured back at me as I just pulled her into a quick hug before we climbed the stairs together, not even looking back.
There was a pleasant coolness that met us as soon as we reached the top. It took no effect on my already chilled heart that one was still on fire for the boy who had left me for another.
Nayeon knew this feeling better than anyone else in my circle of friends, simply because she recently had to go through it herself and since then her lips were no longer attached to those of her ex-girlfriend, but to countless cigarettes that provided some reassurance.
Yet it was only one facet, because it would never help her, instead those cigarettes lulled Nayeon into a death that was presented as harmless sleep.
It was not long before we were at the top, climbing the great stone wall that was supposed to keep you from falling. My eyes slid down to the abyss on which still drove the one or other car, dizziness grabbed my head briefly and I closed my eyes tightly.
Nayeon, on the other hand, seemed quite relaxed. Her cool attitude applied to everything.
Dangling her feet, her tired eyes surveyed the region and her hand tapped barely noticeably on her lap, so I slowly took pity to open my eyes again to slide closer to my friend.
Slowly and carefully I lay down - With my head on her lap and my irises directed towards the sky, trying to count the countless stars that stood out there.
"Do you want one?" Demonstratively, Nayeon wiggled her pack of cigarettes, from which she was willing to once again have her lungs destroyed another piece.
Absently, I nodded. This question was based on our original plan - to smoke one together to forget the stress for a few seconds while the smoke floated through our bodies like magic gas. Although already on the way here I could not refrain from enjoying a cigarette.
Silence settled around us like a warming blanket, where we just indulged in our thoughts - presumably of the events that had brought us back together.
"He's probably seducing someone else right now," it escaped Nayeon's lips in a murmur as I exhaled smoke toward the tall buildings that were lined up close together here.
"That's what I thought earlier." Grimacing, the scenes played out like a movie in my mind's eye, which I scowled to close.
"This isn't the first time that..." leaving the rest of the sentence hanging in the air, I sighed strained. At some point, all my former partners found someone better to leave me for them in the end.
At the same time, I strained every time to be a good friend who did them justice.
Every day some person was left behind. Every day someone out there experienced love sickness or someone had their heart cut into a thousand pieces with the painful chains of words that wrapped around the organ and slowly tightened.
Every day there was a battle of hearts in search of some love.
And we were not spared either.
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hello <3
I am sorry that I needed so much time for the first oneshot but it's not as easy as I thought. Not only because it's completely in English but because school stressed me out as well.
So.. If there's any mistake, feel free to correct me! ^^
