With love Emma

Chapter 13

Emma got up and knocked on the connecting door. Lord Advent was in his nightgown, she was preoccupied in her own emotion to be embarrassed.

'Your Grace, I need your help.'

He nodded and looked at her expectantly.

'I need you to teach me how to fight.'

'You want to learn to fight.' It was not a question but he merely stated it.

'I want to be able to defend myself.'

His eyes narrowed as he asked sharply, 'Protecting you is my duty. Did something happen?'

She didn't know why, but she didn't want to talk about it to anyone. So she said, 'No, I am starting to have nightmares again. I would feel safe if I knew how to protect myself.'

He nodded, 'Ok, I will teach you.'

'The girls! You should teach Amelia and Amanda too.'

He nodded again. She thanked him and left.

Lord Advent knew Emma was hiding something. Something must have happened in Evans' ball to bother her. He decided to instruct Rame to uncover it discreetly. He was also concerned about Emma's repeating nightmares. Stripping Morval of the title and the lands suddenly felt not enough of a punishment. He should rot in jail for all his misdeeds.

Amelia grumbled about having to wake up early. Amanda yawned heavily. Only Emma looked eager to start. He first taught them how to throw a punch. Their blows were so weak. This was going to be long and hard work, he thought.

Lord Advent taught them basic core exercises. Amanda quit in two days. He then taught them how to incapacitate a man with a groin kick. Emma was eager to learn, she had many questions on how to defend herself in various situations.

Emma was exercising alone when Lord Advent joined her.

'Looks like Amelia is not joining today.'

'Can you...' she hesitated.

'What is it, Emma?'

'How can we escape if someone holds our hair from behind?' she asked in a rush not meeting his eyes.

His vision turned red. He saw the event of that night again. Emma's bruised face filled his mind.

'Lord Advent,' Emma was calling but he didn't hear her. There was a roar in his ear.

'Did he?' he split with anger. He didn't know the details of events that day. He and his men rushed in when they heard her scream for help.

Emma hesitated and didn't answer. That was answer enough. He punched the wall in anger.

She shrieked, 'Lord Advent, please.'

'I am going to kill that bastard.'

Emma held his bruised hands, 'Your Grace, please, I am sorry. I should have never brought that up.'

He was furious and was breathing heavily as Emma touched his arms. 'Your Grace,' she called.

Their eyes met, her breathing hitched. Lord Advent was glorious in his anger. She couldn't help but stare at his lips.

'Wha.. What -' the sound died as he stared at her. Her tongue darted out, moistening her lips. Her lips parted and she looked at him as she wanted to be kissed.

He crushed his lips on hers, he was not gentle. Her inexperienced lips moved along with his. She could feel his anger mixed with concern. He hugged her possessively and pulled her closer.

He kissed her with such intensity. Butterflies erupted in her stomach. Lord Advent held nothing back, he kissed her like she was the air he breathed; the earth he walked. She let out a moan as his tongue explored her mouth. He wanted her. He wanted her with an intensity that he had never felt before.

They broke apart when the door slammed heavily. It was Amelia, she looked lividly at them. Lord Advent moved away from her. But Emma couldn't move, she stood there rooted. She could hear Amelia shouting.

'How could you do this to mom? You didn't come home for weeks after Amy... you never...' her voice broke. 'I am ashamed of you.'

'It's...' Lord Advent started, but Amelia had already turned and fled.

Lord Advent punched the wall angrily, making Emma shriek again.

'I am sorry. I shouldn't have.' He said in a growl.

'What!?' Emma asked weakly.

'It was a mistake.'

Before he could finish she ran. Her vision blurred from the continuous pour of tears. But she kept running, she didn't want to hear him say kissing her was a mistake. She didn't want to hear him apologize. So she ran. She only stopped when she reached the outer edge of the mansion and there was no way to run any further.

The dam broke. Seconds ago, she felt ecstatic by Lord Advent's love for her. She had longed for him every day, but she was a mistake after all. He didn't want her as his wife. Why should he be so kind to her? If he had just been rude and ignored her, it would have been easier for her to hate him.

'Your Grace,' said Mrs. Dennis.

Emma tried to wipe her tears, but it was no use. She was a mess. She was covered in dirt; her hair disheveled as she lay on the ground.

'Your Grace,' Mrs. Dennis said kindly and wrapped her arms around Emma.

Emma was never hugged like this by anyone other than her mother. Mrs. Dennis kept patting Emma till she composed herself.

Mrs. Dennis handed some water and tried to restore Emma's appearance as best as she could. When she deemed her presentable, she took Emma to her chamber. Emma was bathed and put to bed.

Emma woke up feeling empty. She didn't want to hide her feelings anymore. She had to confess her feelings to Lord Advent. Even if he rejected her, she had to tell him how much she loved him. She ran to his study.

'I wish to meet His Grace,' Emma told Mr.Rame.

'I am sorry, His Grace has left for Watford.'

'When will he be back?' she asked, knowing it would only take one or two hours to travel to Watford depending on the London traffic.

'He plans on staying there for a while,' Mr. Rame said, not meeting her eyes.

'If you want any message to be passed, I will be obliged to do so.'

'No, nothing. Thanks Mr. Rame.'

Lord Advent had left, which made it very clear he didn't want to see her anymore.