Hate to love you

Chapter 2

Natasha's eyes had widened at your phone, before looking up to meet your stare.

"Bucky?" She choked out, horror evident in her voice. "As in, the Bucky? Bucky Barnes?"

"Do we know any other Bucky?" You hissed, gritting your teeth. You could already feel the panic creeping up on you, the implication of this revelation settling into your bones.

The man your parents had arranged you to marry was Bucky Barnes. Your ex, Bucky Barnes. You felt, in that split second of silence between you and Nat, a myriad of emotions. Shock, horror, pain, sadness, and most importantly, longing. Longing for the one person you had never managed to shun from your thoughts. It had been so long. So long. But his name still managed to make your heart squeeze.

You gritted your teeth again, feeling anger quickly replace your sadness as you remembered the last few months of your relationship. You remembered all the fights, the screaming and crying and the persistent urge to pull your hair out of frustration. It had been a recurring feeling during those last days. It didn't matter that your two year relationship had been the happiest you had ever been. Because all you remembered was the anger.

Bucky Barnes had been both the best and worst thing to ever happen to you.

Nat was still deep in thought, chewing slowly before she swallowed the food in her mouth. She pursed her lips, looking up at you like she'd just had an idea.

"This is good, Y/N. This is a good thing."

You raised an eyebrow. "And how, pray tell, is this a good thing?"

Nat leaned her forearms on the table. "Bucky is the last person on the planet who would agree to marrying you. The second he realizes it's you, consider this agreement over. Your plan is going to work."

You ignored the pang in your heart at the truth behind Nat's words. She was right. He'd rather kill himself than marry you. You couldn't stand each other back then. You were sure you couldn't stand each other now.

Was it possible to hate and care for the same person? Because you didn't know what to call this feeling. On Nat's indication, you gripped your phone tighter.

Your fingers were trembling as you carefully constructed as blunt of a text as you could, asking him to meet you. You felt your heart jerk when his reply came in two minutes, a familiar ache taking over when the only thing it contained was a place and a time. No hello. Nothing else.

You wished it didn't affect you. You wished it didn't make you want to see him right there and then, for everything to be like it was at the beginning, when you were young and in love and nothing else mattered.

Instead, you were here, hating him like he hated you, sitting in a hospital cafe, clutching your phone like it was the only thing grounding you.

Nat seemed in a much better mood now, looking at the watch on her wrist and nodding to herself.

"I have to go. My break is over." She stood up, picking up the tray in front of her. She seemed to notice the look on your face, giving you a reassuring smile.

"Don't worry about it, Y/N. This is the best thing you could have asked for."

You weren't quite sure you'd agree with that.