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The bus arrived at his stop and San made his way off. He had never felt so down and so lethargic, and all he wanted to do was sleep and cry. He fumbled with his keys before letting himself into his house, placing his stuff down before grabbing a shot-glass and making his way to his room.
One shower and a few shots later San was sat laying in bed, with no enthusiasm or motivation to do anything. His self esteem was already besties with the dust on the floor and he felt disgusting, and he knew this isn't what he should be doing with his life, but San didn't know any better. This has been his life for God knows how many years. He's trapped and no one can save him from the black hole of suffering.
San thought long and hard about his feelings. His heart was aching to be with another, but he didn't know the first thing about love. There was something about Yeosang he couldn't explain, but the sensation he gave him was unmatched. The way his eyes twinkled and how his laugh was ear candy, his aura made San fall deeper and deeper in awe.
He didn't want to admit it. The pair had fought numerous times, and if they weren't fighting there were bickering about something stupid. Nevertheless the inclination to protect Yeosang was innate, and all San wanted to do was to see him smile
just a smile.
"Yeosang... I-.. I Lov-"
San paused...
"Its useless anyway" He resumed, but it was. For what he knew, Yeo had already found love somewhere else. San has to suck it up and deal with it....
but it hurts.
And then there's Wooyoung, and the mess that was going on over there. His teenage love had matured, and he hadn't. As much as the thought of moving on pained him, it was what he had to do.
Wooyoung was happy, so San was too.
However he fucked up big time. San had just ran away after Wooyoung harmlessly introduced himself to his new boyfriend. He couldn't face him even if he wanted to, plus what would Wooyoung even say. San overthought this issue, exploiting every single possible scenario but it the end that was all pointless.
"Im sorry... Wooyoung " He bit his lip and wiped his eye. That was all he could make out in apology to him, regardless of whether he would even hear an apology or not. The tears broke out and San cried into his pillow
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3 days later, 9pm struck. San's mother delivers her son's meals everyday outside his door, assuming San was having another one of his episodes.
Besides using the bathroom, San had been in his room for every minute. He called the boss saying he needed a few days off work to recover, which he was granted, and called Seonghwa just to tell him about the argument with Yeosang and said thats why he wasnt at work. Apart from that he spent those 72 hours just thinking, trying to find out how his redemption arc was going to play out.
wooyoung
yeosang
wooyoung
yeosang
wooyoung...
"Lets start with him"
YOU ARE READING
Us // SanSang
Fanfic"I hate you... but i like us" Some things you forget, others you remember. But for San his memories are burnt into his memory, and obstruct his mind so much that he's forgotten how to love someone.
