Emma.

emma and family

Emma's relationship with her family is neither bad nor good. There will be time where Emma loves her family more than the world could ever imagine. There will also be some time where Emma just want to run away and abandon her family for good.

Emma always looks up to her friends' families. They're super kind. Emma's friends sometimes share some stories about their family and siblings.

Of course, there will be time where they and their family fought, but it'll be just for a while. The next thing Emma knew, they would spend some nice quality time with their family.

Emma wants some quality time with her family too, but they are too busy with their own life.

When they are little, Emma is mostly close to her little brother. They're just three years apart. Despite the age gap, Emma and her brother, Andy are very close with each other.

They understood each other very well. Whenever Emma's not in the mood, Andy would know and leave Emma alone to calm down.

Andy is one of the reasons Emma wants to continue living in this cruel world.

This world where happiness is a fake lights. Fake smiles that'll eventually dim by time.

Emma and her mother has this mutual love-hate relationship. In those romance novel, a love-hate trope is considered as very, very romantic.

But the truth is, it's not. It's so painful. Imagine not knowing if the actions are because of hates or love ?

Mom makes dinner, is it because she loves me?

Oh... no. The dinner was for dad. Since we're here, she had no choice than to cook for us too.

Is it true ? Emma hopes it's not.

Emma's father has anger issues. It's bad enough to the point he would scold them out of nowhere whenever he's stressed out. Once, her father had beat the ass out of Andy because Andy can't and won't sleep (or so that's what Emma thought)

Emma was awake that time. Her big sister, Amelia, too is pretty much awake. That scene is still fresh in both of their mind, it left them traumatized for life.

Nowadays, her father is getting much better. If he's mad, he'll just go out and get some drink with his friends. Which is very much better than beating his children. Thanks to Amelia not scared of standing up for herself and showing emotions to their parents.

Emma won't blame her father. Emma knows her father is trying his best. He's trying to change. But Emma can't deny that what her father did in the past is still haunting her.

Emma knows her parents is trying their best. Maybe... maybe... what they thought is the best for us is actually never the best. They did their best but their 'best' turns out to be the worst.

For example, Amelia. Amelia is the best sister Emma could ever asked for. That's if Emma can stand all the blame she always put on her. Emma thinks Amelia always blamed her for everything because of all the minor events that actually traumatized Amelia.

Once, their father scolded Amelia for chatting with a boy from her school, (which Emma knows who) and Amelia blamed Emma for snitching.

It's a wrong thing actually. But Amelia doesn't want to be in the wrong. So she blamed Emma for it. Even though Emma had little to none relation to that particular action Amelia did.

Emma never snitched. Her mother caught Amelia by herself chatting with the boy. Emma was sleeping when things took place. But Emma failed to defend herself. She went all silence.

If Emma wants to share a secret, spill some tea of some sort, she would go to Amelia. The same goes otherwise. But Emma can't deny that sometimes it hurts.

Amelia once told Emma that she got depressed for three years because of Emma 'snitching' to their parents.

Emma understood Amelia and just took the blame even though those so called 'three years' of Amelia being depressed is the 'three years' of Emma being closed to cutting her throat.

Those three years is so hard for Emma. Not having Amelia by her side and Andy is still too small to understand how the world works. Well, Emma too is actually still not old enough to understand this world. Emma is 10 when the event took place.

Emma survived not slitting her throat open for three years. And Emma's not sure if she would be able to do it again.

Emma loves her family. But do Emma's family love Emma?

At this point, the main reason Emma's still alive is because she's looking forward for more heart-warming stories from her friends about their family.

So warm. And fuzzy. And bubbly. The feelings Emma felt when she imagine those heart-warming family gathering scene her friends told but the character is Emma and her family. It's astronomical. But a bit too impossible.

Emma and her family's true relationship is still a mystery even till now.