CANCER - From the Outside Looking in

THE DIAGNOSIS - Chapter 2

On Monday the 10th of November 2003 Steven phoned me from work to tell me that he was going to leave work early to go to the doctor and then home because he did not feel well. He felt nauseous and had an upset stomach. The doctor prescribed medication for gastric flu and sent him home having booked him off until the Wednesday.

On Wednesday morning he was feeling a little better but still not well enough to return to work, so he went back to the doctor. The doctor gave him more medication and decided to do some blood tests to see what the problem was.

Thursday morning, he was called by the doctor's office and asked to return for yet more blood tests because the doctor wanted confirmation of what he had found. He went and had them done. We knew that something had to be wrong because doctors don't normally call the patients with any results. It was your responsibility to phone them.

Friday morning Steven was phoned again. Now he was told that he should come into the doctor's office straight away because they had discovered a problem in his blood test and wanted him to see a specialist and have some more test run.

We were now starting to wonder what on earth the problem could be. We obviously did not expect anything too serious because Steven was not a very sickly person. Sure, he suffered from sinus problems and had become asthmatic due to allergies but other than that he got the usual colds and flu as well as a bout of gastric flu the previous year during which he had lost quite a bit of his excess weight, never anything serious or life threatening. He had no pain or discomfort, except for the occasional indigestion, and by this time his gastric flu had started to clear up. He was feeling much better and was almost back to his usual self, so what could be wrong?

He returned to the doctor's office where he was told that he should go for some ex-rays and once those were done, he was to see the specialist.

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By this time, I was no longer working in a corporation. A friend of mine and me had decided to go into business together as estate agents. He already had a registered company but had been working for other agencies instead of himself. His wife Annabelle had left him one week earlier. We all helped her to move not even realizing that Steven was already so sick at this time even though doing the work tired him out.

I spent the day at work worrying myself silly over what these tests would show. I finally managed to get hold of Steven at about 2 p.m. Friday afternoon. I asked him what the doctors had to say and he just blurted out: "I have cancer."

I felt numb and did not know how to respond. "Are you joking?" I asked. Knowing full well that this wasnt the type of thing anyone would joke about, but what else do I say?

"I'm being dead serious. I must be at Marlon Hospital Monday morning for them to do a biopsy to see if they can determine what cancer I have."

"Okay I will see you after work then we can talk about this. Bye"

"Bye, see you later."

I went to my business partner, Sean, who was busy watering the plants at the time.

Being so flabbergasted I just stood there and blurted out that I had just spoken to Steven and that he has been told he has cancer. Sean just stood there in absolute shock and asked: "But how can this be? Steven is never sick."

"I dont know, he says they picked it up in his blood test and he must have a biopsy on Monday to see what cancer he has."

I left Sean standing in the garden with his own thoughts while I returned to my desk and spent the rest of the afternoon functioning in automatic mode as if my mind had gone off to another place.

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After work I collected the boys from aftercare and headed home. How on earth were we going to explain this to Travis (9) and Sheldon (7)? They are so young; would they even understand the concept of what was going to happen.

When I got home, I did not know what to say to Steven. After all what do you say to someone who has basically just been given their death sentence or so we would all assume. After all, we all know that when we hear the word "cancer" we automatically assume the worst and don't even consider that there might be a cure for it or at least the chance of the doctor's extending your life with medication. This is also brought about by what we see on television and by the amount of people who die from this dreadful dreaded disease.

"Hi Steven, how are you feeling?"

"Strangely enough I am feeling better than I have been feeling in the past couple of days."

"So, what exactly are they going to do on Monday?"

"Dr Jurgen says they will make a small incision so that they can cut a piece of the tissue out to send away to Cape Town for analysis and then they will know how to go about treatment because they will know which cancer they are dealing with. He says the cut will be very small in the bikini line."

"Oh, okay so what time must I take you in?"

"I must be there before twelve. They will do the op in the afternoon."

"That's not a problem. I will take the boys to school then I'll come back home and get you. I will ask my dad if he can fetch them after school." "Talking about the boys what are we going to tell them? They will need to know what's wrong with you."

"I don't know, you can talk to them."

"Okay I'll talk to them just now."