hatred

Im fine! Totally fine.

WARNING! EATING DISORDER BULIMIA AND MENTAL BREAKDOWN
That's Melanie's song orange juice which is based off of bulimia.
"Camilo, what do you want for breakfast?" You ask while standing at the kitchen island. "Well I don't know mi amor, what is there?" He replies with a toothy grin spread across his face. You roll your eyes at him and check the pantry. "Wellllll..." You trail off, looking at the half empty cupboard. "I'm just going to have an orange; you can have..." you scan your eyes across the middle shelf until you spot something that he might like. "You can have an arepa and one poached egg." You say. His goofy grin fades and turns into a frown. "Is that allll?" He moans (😏 I'm sorry) "Yes Cami, now be grateful I give you food and don't trap you in the attic to starve." You laugh. His eyes widens as he asks, "you wouldn't actually do that Y/n?" "Of course not idiota." You say smirking. "Or at least that's what you think.." you whisper. "What was that?" He asks smiling. "Oh nothing amor.." You make him his breakfast and eat your apple. "Why are you only eating that?" He asks while stuffing a mouthful of an arepa in his mouth. "I'm just not hungry.." you reply, knowing the real answer is so much different. You were hungry. You were extremely hungry, even. You craved what Camilo was eating, but you couldn't eat that. It was way to much. After you finished eating your apple, you excused yourself. You walked to the bathroom and tied your hair up. You sat on the floor with your head over the toilet seat. You braced yourself and shoved your fingers down your throat. You gagged before throwing up. You were coughing and tears were streaming down your face. 'Knock knock knock' you hear from the door. "Y/n? Are you ok?" Camilo asks. "Yeah, I'm fine!" You reply with a shaky voice. You weren't fine. You were everything but fine. You hated lying to your friends, your family and Camilo, but it was the only way. If they found out, the would stop you. You cleaned yourself up and walked out of the bathroom. Camilo was sitting on the couch fiddling with his finger. You walk up to him and he looks at your pale face. "Dios mio! Are you ok?!" He asks while cupping your face. "Yes cami, I'm fine." You say. "Are you sure? You can talk to me about anything!" He says, looking you in the eyes. This was what broke you. You had never been told that you can "talk to someone" your mother hadn't noticed. Your father didn't care. Your best friend never knew. It was horrible. You wanted to stop so badly, but you couldn't. It was a horrific cycle that went on and on. You started crying and hugged Camilo tightly. "I-I-..." you couldn't even say anything as the sobs took your breath away. It was uncontrollable. You couldn't help taking in massive breaths and letting out loud sobs. You started to feel dizzy and tired as the tears flooded your face. He didn't tell you to calm down. He just hugged you tighter. You pulled away and sat down. "Y/n. We need to talk." Camilo said seriously. Shit...

God. Emotional. The mental breakdown bit was based off of mine from last week. I think that eating disorders should be taken more seriously and talked about more. They're not something to laugh or joke about. People die from them and it's honestly just sad.. just remember, no one is perfect! You stunning and amazing no matter what anyone says. If anyone ever insults you about the way you look, don't pay any mind to it. I know it sounds hard, but just keep thinking positively and brush it off! It will make you feel so much better, I can assure you! If you need anything, feel free to talk to me abt it in the comments or privately!

Also do u want me to post my Melanie Martinez biography that I had to write for school? It's printed btw!