Ab"sin"the

lIvInG dEaD

Your face is in my dreams
You're reaching out to me
Tear stains on my cheeks
I'm screaming in my sleep
Would you take me please?

I need to blow off steam
But I'm keeping it all in
I'm losing concentration
Something is dragging me to the edge
And I'm slipping away slowly

It's all just a game of pretend
And I know I'm good at this
Why are you haunting me?
Or am I still just holding unto you?
We both know it's hard to let go

What's he saying?
What's she saying?
My mind is nowhere near
Probably faraway in my past
Deep into my childhood

Remember when we were one
But now you're nowhere to be found
I need to see you, feel you, hear you
Before I step off the golden
You know I can, for you

Mornings are the worst
People say I'm better now
Last year I was a mess
So what if I'm just garbage now?
Decorated with flowers, so many thorns

I've been socializing more
Trying to stop this pain
It's starting to choke me
And I can feel myself
Drifting into the dark slowly

I can't differentiate reality from my dreams
They are both syncing together
And I'm seeing you, a living dead
How can I see what doesn't exist?

Hold my hand
I wish you would
You smell like comfort
And I smell like suicide
If only it could lead me to you

How can I see, but not see you?
Hear you but it's unreal
How is it possible
For me to feel all of this
And not be able to put it in words?

You're driving me insane
And uncertainty is driving me crazy
Do I want it to stop?
Maybe I do, I want to be happy
But I can't lose you again

I'm zoning out
You're zoning in
I can see your smile
Can you read my pain?
Humans can't, maybe a ghost will

I want to be with you
In heaven, in hell, in purgatory
If only I knew the way
Maybe I won't be lost
I haven't been able to find my way home

You didn't throw any tantrums!
Maybe it's because I can't believe
Maybe I'm still living in denial
You're still alive to me
Just out of sight, but not out of mind

You didn't tell me
Why did you hide it?
And how was I so blind?

I'll be on the mountain soon
I'll be waiting for you
I know you'll disappoint me
You always do.

Do I still have to remind you guys?