𝐻𝒾𝓈 𝓅𝑒𝒶𝓈𝒶𝓃𝓉 (Nikocado Avocado x male reader)

ORLIN HOME IS???

The door had just slammed open. A colombian, 300-350 pound man is seen with luggage. "NIK!!!!" Orlin roars. Orlin looks like he was about to continue to scream until seeing you. "ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME?" Orlin roars in your face, spraying his spit on you. "NO, IT'S THE CARETAKER YOUU BOUHGT FOR MEEE!!" Nik yells back. "I DIDN'T HIR YOU A CARETAKER!!" Nik makes a pinched-mouth expression, rapidly blinking. Orlin grabs his sandal from his foot and acts like he was going to throw it at Nik, but before actually throwing it, Nik grabs his sandal and throws it at Orlin. Orlin cries in pain, but not for long, as he throws the sandal harder than Nik did, causing Nik to get injured. You scream. "DON'T THROW A SANDAL AT HIm!" You yell, despite being in the condition you were in. Orlin looks at you for a second, but ignores your presence. "I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU, ORLIN!! Y/N IS NICER TO ME THAn YOU!!" Your eyes started tearing up, not from the yelling, but that Nik had confirmed his choice between you and Orlin. "GOOD RIDANCE, NOW HE HAS TO DEAL WITH YOUR MESSES AND DIABETES!!" Nik wheezes for a second and looks at Orlin with a surprised look. "I don't" Nik's smile disappears "I don't have the beetus!!! ORLIN! DON'T say that..." Nik says. "Y/N, don't believe a word this man says, he's trying to get you to leave me..." "Sure... I'M LEAVING!" The man leaves with his luggage, and slams the door. Nik turns to you. "You don't believe him right?" Nik asks for reassurance. You nod. You weren't just singing Shawn Mendes music just because, you were singing Shawn Mendes music because you meant the lyrics. 

After the whole debacle, you think about how Nik lied to you about him breaking hsi ribs. You didn't need to hold him, you didn't need to break all of your bones. But, you just forget it, as either way, it was romantic. "Y/N, I'm going to make a mukbang." "Oh... T-that's great..." You smile faintly. "Yeah, uhm, can you go to popeyes and get me 4 12 piece fried chicken, a 36 piece nuggets and fries? JUST GET ME A LOT OF FOOD, PEASANT!!!" You open your eyes widely in startlement, and smile faintly. "O-of course..." You struggle to get up as, well, your legs were broken. "HURRY UP!!!" Nik screeches. "UhG!!! I guess i have to get it because you seem to not know how to walk." Nik stomps, his stomach going up and down, but he didn't stomp hard, as if he didn't want the neighbors to hear. His face pinched. Every 3 steps he would mumble, "ugh!" Just then, you hear what sounds like the iphone "ding" noise. Nik stops immediately after hearing the noise. He grabs the phone from his pocket and looks at the phone for a while until turning to you quickly. "IT'S Nancy!!!" He yells. "W-who's nancy??" You ask, in tears from the heart break. "My lawyer!! She just told me Orlin is suing me!" Just then, the door is opened, and by the same Colombian man. "NIK! I'M SUING YOU!!!" Nik turns his head towards him, his chins still pointed at you. "I JUST GOT PROOF THAT YOU ATE OUR BIRD, MR NOODLE!! AND KIWI OUR SLOTH!!!" Nik looks at him with bewilderment. "Wha- ORLIN! You know that isn't true!!" "Who's kiwi and mr noodle...?" Orlin looks at you. "NIK!! ARE YOU STILL CHEATING ON ME???" Nik looks at you and back at him. He smiles mischievously and struts over to you. He sits on your then broken lap, that was even more broken than before. A few snaps were heard. He puts his arm around you. "Yes, this is my new husband.... ISN'T THAT RIGHT, Y/N!!!??" Orlin grabs his sandal and threatens to throw it at him, but notices that you were still broken. (on the inside and outside😞) He dropped the sandal on the floor and put it back on. "NIK YOU JUST BROKE Y/N'S BONES EVEN MORE!!!" Nik looked at him, bewildered. "I did no- Y/N did I break your bones even more???" You shake your head. "He's trying not to get even more hurt from your fat!!" Orlin shouted. You were about to defend Nik until he did it himself. "I am NOT FAT. Don't you see my shirt?" He points to the shirt saying, "I IDENTIFY AS SKINNY". "Buy my merch, uh uh, buy my merch-" Nik sang until "NO ONE WANTS YOUR MERCH!!" Orlin interrupts. Nik jumps more on your lap, but instead of a snap it sounded like powder. Nik smiles at Orlin, creating more double chins. "He's my hubby... Orlin, go fetch us some Popeyes for our mukbang-" "OF COURSE YOU WANT POPEYES BECAUSE IT SERVES CHICKEN!!! YOU ATE OUR BIRD!!!" Nik looks at him, chuckling under his breath. "I did no- STOP SAYING I ATE MR NOODLE!! He just disappeared after I let him outside!" Orlin facepalms. Orlin looks at your struggling self. "NIK GET OFF HIM-" "BRACE BRACE!!" Nik moves his hands on your face and torso. You blush. He stops for a moment. Nothing is heard, but you feel something wet on your stomach, which he was sitting on, probably fracturing all your organs. Nik cries while looking up. "NIK DID YOU JUST SOIL Y/N'S LAP!!!!" Orlin shouts. Nik stops crying and looks at Orlin. "You know, since you decided to not be here, I had no one to clean me up... SO GUESS WHO'S FAULT IS IT THAT I SOILED HIS LAP???" Nik exclaims as he points at Orlin with his signature facial expression. 

Orlin walks up to Nik and you and pushes him lightly. "OUCH!!!" ""GET OFF THE SHARE!!!" Nik smiles and chuckles. "You mean chair... HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA" "I SAID THAT! SHARE!!!" Nik continues to laugh hysterically as you struggle to breath. Orlin pushes Nik hard enough to push him like humpty dumpty. You breath heavily as you don't move. "I'm so sorry. How did you even meet Nik?" Orlin asks. You don't speak. He just pushed your lover. He sighs. "GET UP NIK!!" Nik jerks on the ground before getting up. "YOU JUST ASSAULTED ME!! I CHALLENGE YOU TO BOX ME RIGHT NOW!!!" Nik yells as he puts his hands up as though he was going to fight him.