Together or apart

Fight or Flight

"So, what'd your mom say?" I sighed, we had survived dinner in silence and were currently sitting beside each other on a commercial plane.

"She asked me how you were. In bed." I smirked.

Phil's face was as read as a tomato when he faced me, "Not my words."

He took a deep breathe, "What'd you say?"

"I said," I looked at him, "I believe my exact words were 'Moommm.'." I rolled my eyes.

"She doesn't want me to live a life like her. Having a child earlier than planned, said child being an accident, and then juggling the life of a dedicated SHIELD agent and a loving mother. She doesn't want me to live in burden and regret of a child."

"Well, do you?" I raised an eyebrow, "regret this."

I took a deep breath, "No." He nodded.

He reached over and left his hand hovering over my stomach, "May I?" I smiled and pushed his hand under mine.

His finger touched my bare skin and I shivered. I smiled at him and looked at the ceiling.

"Hey," Phil started, "You okay?" I took a quivering breath.

"Yeah, no." I bit my lip.

"Do you want me to move?"

"No, no. I just- C'mere." I pulled him onto me and glued my lips to his. He deepened the kiss as my other hand grabbed the collar of his shirt. I moaned as his tongue roamed my mouth. I groaned as I felt his hand slid up my lose shirt and under my bra. I hooked my finger at the band of his jeans and -

Suddenly, the speakers roared, "All passengers, please fasten your seatbelts. We are approaching your destination." The pilot repeated. We abruptly pulled apart, panting.

I bit my lip, "Hormones." I acted innocent but soon smirked.

"Well, good thing we payed the few extra hundred dollars for the private room." He remarked and I rolled my eyes.

I fastened my seatbelt while Phil did the same, "Phil?" He hummed. "Are we - Are we doing the right thing?" I whispered and he looked at me.

"Hey, Mel." He whispered, "Where's this coming from?"

"I just - we're SHIELD agents, Phil. We can go on a mission and never come back. Another thing, we're not together, Phil. Not yet, anyway. Won't that - won't that complicate things?"

He squeezed my hand, "Don't worry about that. We can leave the field. We can - we can run backend only. Hell, we can get a desk job." I glared, "Ok, maybe not a desk job. But there are other things to do than have a life threatening job."

"Like?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Like being teachers, doctors, even just cops." 

I snorted, "I don't think we'd survive as any of those for a week."

"Exactly. I mean, there are worst things to do than be a SHIELD agent." 

I sighed as I felt the aircraft touch the pavement, "Dear passengers, thank you for travelling with Air Canada. We hope we met your expectations." 

I unbuckled the seatbelt and faced Phil once he stood up, "Thank you." I whispered, "For not leaving." I stood on my toes and softly kissed him. Neither of us deepened it, nor did we feel the need to. We simply enjoyed the minute and let the silence speak its truth. 

"I love you." I nodded.

"I know." I still couldn't say those three words to him, no matter how much I wanted to. 

I pulled out of the rental car parking lot and on to the nearly empty street. The drive was mostly spent in silence, except for the occasional directions called out by Phil. I pulled into the driveway of the Coulson's home.

I faced Phil and placed a hand over his own, "You sure about this?" 

He nodded, "The sooner, the better." I softly smiled.             

"C'mon. I'm sure your mom wouldn't wanna wait." I pushed the door open and waited for Phil to get out before I locked the car. 

I stood behind Phil while he knocked on the door and waited for a reply. 

After a minute or so, the door opened and a tired, yet happy, Julie Coulson greeted us with her signature smile.

"Phil! Melinda!" She hugged us both, "Come in, come in, it must be freezing outside."

I stepped inside, behind Phil and shrugged my coat off, shoes coming off next. I smiled as Phil did the same, "How are things, Melinda?"

"They're - they're okay. How are- How are you doing? Phil told me about -," I stopped myself before I said too much.

She smiled nonetheless, "I'm fine, dear. Everyone dies. My time's just coming sooner than most."  Julie Coulson said with a smile still plastered on her face. Her words held no guilt or sorrow, her face looked peaceful, even though this situation was unfair to her in more ways than one.

I subtly shook my head and looked at Phil, who had stood up from the bench a few minutes ago. 

"I'm feeling a little woozy." I whispered. Phil reached out a hand  to support my weight and led me to the living room. I settled on the fluffy couch, the kind that mom never bought, and apologetically looked at Julie, "Sorry, just a headache." I reassured the worried woman with all my might.

Phil reentered the living room with a tray that held three mugs, he handed one to me, then his mother, and then took his own. I sipped the warm liquid and closed my eyes. I had felt this headache long before it even happened and only by a little, the tea soothed the migraine.

"How far along are you?" I choked on my tea as soon as the five words left Julie Coulson's mouth. 

I cleared my throat and looked at Phil, who basically had half of his coffee spilt on his polo shirt, "What?"

She smirked, "You really think I  wouldn't know if my son's best friend was pregnant or not? Me?" She scoffed, "I have been a mother since before either of you even knew about sex."

"Uh, 3 months and 4 days." I replied her previous question.

"And it's Phil's." She wasn't asking, neither was she accusing. It was a statement. I nodded.

"Mom-," Julie held up her pointer finger up before he said another word.

"Please tell me it was consensual and not something else." Her face was serious, yet I couldn't help the snort that made his way out of my throat. She looked at me, "Sorry, I'm sorry, but did you actually think that one of us," I waved at Phil and me, "would rape the other? Julie, we've known each other for a decade. It was 100% consensual."

She smiled, "At least, I'll see my grandchild before I leave." We fell into awkward silence after that.

So I thought, screw it, I got up and threw my arms around Julie's warm body.

"Thank you, For being here when I need you. I -," The lump in my throat returned, "You mean a lot to me, a lot."