Castle and The Originals

Chapter 4

The sound of her front door slamming shut resonated into Lilly Rush's backyard as she sat in stunned silence, looking in the direction Scotty had just departed. Part of her could not believe that he had just walked out and left her, the other part hoped it was just a mistake and he'd come right back through the door. Maybe he'd just gone out to get more drinks?

Snorting bitterly at the thought, she realized with a sinking heart that she really was on her own - she really had turned into her mother. Single, pregnant and alone. She'd tried to prepare herself for the fact that Scotty may not want to be involved in their baby's life, but if she was truly honest with herself, she'd never actually expected him to leave.

This was Scotty! The man who had been by Elisa's side the whole time she had been sick, the son who went home at least once a week for dinner with his parents, the guy who put up with her crap everyday and tried to help her out with her life, even if she didn't want him to. Hell, he was even part of the reason she had gotten together with Kite in the first place! He was a gentleman too. Sure he acted cocky, but he always held the door open for her, always insisted on driving when they were out in the field together, got her coffee when he got one for himself, made sure some takeout was always left for her - made sure she ate it as well. At first it had driven her crazy, but then she realized that to him, doing this stuff was his way of caring, of making sure his partner was okay. He couldn't talk to her about the stuff he talked to Nick, Will and Boss about, but he could make sure she was looked after.

So that's why she was so surprised with what he had just done. Prior to tonight, if anyone had asked her for her definition of a decent man, she would have said Scotty. Sure, he'd had the slip up with the cocktail waitress after Elisa, but when she'd calmed down enough after their confrontation in PPD, she'd realized that he hadn't deliberately gone out to have an affair with one of the two people that had almost destroyed her life nearly a decade ago. It was just bad luck that his rebound after Elisa had been with that woman.

Eventually he'd learnt his lesson with the cocktail waitress. He'd picked himself up and started to come to terms with what Elisa had done and she'd forgiven him when he apologized, she truly felt he'd earnt it and she wasn't really upset by that point anyway. What a fool she felt now though.

Anger flooded though Lilly then as she'd remembered how Scotty had defended the cocktail waitress, said she was good at heart and had changed. That was before the evidence had been presented to him and he'd had to accept the truth. But her - his partner of nearly two years - he had just left without a backward glance. Left her with a child that he was partly responsible for! What was the saying? It takes two to tango.

She felt hurt and utterly betrayed that Scotty had supported some two bit ho, who was clearly a criminal, but her and his child he'd just walked away from. She wasn't in love with Scotty, but she had considered him a friend - a good friend - and his betrayal hurt, more than his affair with that woman. That night after George she'd let him in, let him see her at her lowest, something she had never done before. When he'd pulled up outside her house that night all she could see was the darkness lurking behind the windows and a wave of fear had crashed down on her so heavy she thought she might drown. Logically she knew George was dead, she had pulled the trigger after all, but her heart still thought he might be hiding in the darkness somewhere. She'd been relieved when Scotty had suggested a drink, not only because it would save her from having to go into the darkness for a while, but because for one night she could just drink her fears into oblivion, safe in the knowledge that her partner had her back. She'd trusted Scotty to take care of her, and in their own bizarre way, he had taken care of her because as much as she hated to admit it, that night she had needed him. The alcohol hadn't helped numb her pain, but the way he'd kissed her and touched her, she'd been able to forget everything, if only for those few hours with Scotty. She thought he felt the same after their conversation the morning after - he'd certainly said all the right words to make her believe he had needed her too. Doubt flooded her body then. She was supposed to be one of Philly's best detectives, was she really that stupid that she couldn't see she had only been another notch on his bed post?

That was the other thing that confused her. The way he talked about his family it was as if they meant everything to him, so how could he walk away from his own flesh and blood? Admittedly this baby was anything but planned, but still, it was his blood, his family, and by the way he talked about his family, they were the most important thing in his life.

Suddenly all the anger, the hurt, the betrayal - everything - drained away and she just felt exhausted. As if the weight of the day's events had fallen down on her all at once and all she could think of was curling up in her bed and sleeping. Her eyes widened and a wave of nausea washed over her as she realized she would have to sleep in the bed where Scotty and she had...

No, she couldn't sleep in her bed tonight, not in the place where Scotty and she had expressed so many feelings, felt so many emotions, not after he'd abandoned her.

Glancing back into her house she saw the day bed by the French doors and realized that is where she would be sleeping tonight. It just looked so inviting right now with its cushy pillows, soft blankets - and no memories of Scotty. It was so close too.

Rising slowly, because she really did feel like her limbs had turned to lead, she moved into her house and collapsed onto the day bed. She felt something crease in her pocket as she lays down on her side and remembered the picture the radiographer had given her from the scan that morning - she'd put it into her pocket earlier in the evening in the hope that Scotty would want to see it. Chuckling darkly as she removed the picture from her pocket, she realized that was never going to happen now; it was just going to be her and the baby.

She lays there with the picture held between her fingers whilst her thumb caressed her bean shaped baby tenderly. She tried to think of a name to call the fetus, as "baby" was starting to sound too real and "it" just felt too cold and impersonal for something growing inside of her.

Bean.

She liked that for a nickname, and well, it did look like a bean at the moment.

Olivia and Tripod must have sensed that something was wrong with their owner as they appeared from upstairs and joined Lilly on the day bed. Tripod took watch in front of Lilly's abdomen, as if sensing there was now something greater in the house to protect, leaving Olivia to snuggle with Lilly as she pulled the ginger cat to her chest and hugged her tight. Tears started to slide down Lilly's cheeks and into Olivia's fur as she starred at the picture in her hand. Realization hits her then that Bean really was going to grow up without a father, without a family, that it really was going to be just the two of them. Was she going to be enough?

She must have fallen asleep at some point because the next thing she knew she was disturbed by a knocking on her front door. Frowning, she checked the clock and noted it was past 1AM. Moving cautiously towards the door, her detective the peephole. The sight that greeted her made her gasp and step away.