Natalia Romanova was the golden child in the Red Room - the star pupil, the teacher's pet, the best of the best. Everybody knew it, including all the girls in her cohort, including Y/N Y/L/N.
But just as she was the favourite, Y/N was the least fav...
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Now that I knew I needed Natalia back in my life, it was a matter of calling her and telling her that. It had only been a month since she left, but it had felt like much longer and I wasn't so sure how to do it.
Thankfully, she ended up calling me, to my surprise.
I happened to be cleaning my bedroom when my phone rang, and I wasn't thinking much of it until I saw her name appear across my screen and my heart dropped. Immediately answering it, I put the phone to my ear and froze.
"Natalia," I said slowly, almost expecting it to be someone else. Why would she be calling?
Then my worries were put to rest when I heard her exhale shakily, breathing out my name in response. "Y/N."
It had been too long, and the mere sound of her voice was enough to bring tears to my eyes. I took a seat on the edge of my bed and held my breath with anticipation. I had so much to say, but she'd called first so it was only fair to let her speak.
"I didn't think you'd answer," she said with a hoarse voice. "I'm glad you did."
I swallowed hard. "I didn't think you'd want to speak to me again. I was going to call you."
She let out a small breathy laugh, barely there but enough to show her amusement. "Well, that could never happen, could it, Y/N?"
She didn't sound mad. And my heart began to beat at its regular pace again, knowing she didn't hate my guts.
"Why did you want to call me?" she asked reluctantly but with a hint of curiosity in the way she upturned her voice.
I rested my head in my hand, wiping away my tears. "You go first. You called me."
"Right, of course." She paused, then said softly, "I need to say sorry."
"Me, too," I said, my voice cracking.
"I was so horrible," she continued, and she sounded as emotional as I was, "I never meant any of what I said."
"Neither did I," I told her with a frown, vision blurry, and then it all just came out without warning. "You're everything to so many people, Nat. You're a hero. You do what I never could, and I was being selfish when I told you to stay. For once, I wanted to be." I whimpered, wiping my eyes as I continued. "It's not fair that I have to lose you again. I just got you back."
"You're not losing me," she promised, her own voice cracking as she did. "And I shouldn't have said what I did. I love your life, Y/N, I love every bit of it. I didn't mean any of it. You're not wasting anything, you're living, something I still haven't figured out yet. Not properly. You deserve to be selfish. I should've understood that. I do now."
I smiled through my tears, heart aching at her words. "I'll throw it all away for you, Nat. I will. I don't need it. I just need you. It's only ever been you."
