Longing | Percy Jackson

of tears and tragedy

She knew he would have to go. It doesn't make anything easier.

It's barely a day and he's collecting himself, picking himself up piece by piece (He's not careful enough, he forgot to arrange those pieces like before) and putting on a facade. Her heart aches.

It is not how it is supposed to be.

With the Cessation, the nature is in conflict. She is not one with a connection of blood and ichor to the divine world but even she can tell, the gods a fighting.

Something terribly wrong has gone down and Olympus is at the brink of war, again.

The gods are fighting. Their domains also fight with them.

Percy had been young, when she first found out that the weather could have a terrible to a blissful effect on his mood, how a bright could bring a smile and how a stormy day could bring out anger and annoyance.

He was a force of nature, not meant to be controlled.

And yet he was doing just the opposite and she knew the result it would bring. His powers would react and explode with the exertion he puts.

Olympus was already fighting. Nature was already at wreak.

The gods would not want the nature to fight back, at least not the least benevolent ones.

Poseidon has visited her once her boy was still small and innocent. "I'm nature, it is not just the oath, but it is wrong for me to sire a mortal child. I meant to father monsters, creatures with fins and tails and hooves, not someone so small and fragile (someone I already wish to protect and take under the riptide with me, she deciphered) Look at him. He is my child, and he hides his monstrosity terribly."

She didn't know then, how to reply to such a claim.

Now, she was just afraid.

Her child was someone the ancient Greeks would have fought wars on to win him like a price. (Poseidon had told her once, Percy Jackson brings out something ancient, far older than something she can comprehend in the gods he's made friends with.) The gods were ancient. And she was so so afraid.

What must happen now?

When for the cruel ones, dominating the human race was so much easier when half the population was wiped off.

Even wars were getting old.

"I don't know if there's anyone to help at Camp. I don't know who's alive-" His voice cracked. He drew in a shuddering breath and momentarily closed his eyes. "I have to get to them..." He said and left it at that.

Tears slide down her cheek and she wipe them away. He's strong and so is she. She cups his cheeks and gently guides him to bend down and kisses his forehead. She murmurs a blessing and a prayer.

An hour later, when a bag is packed, and someone is ready to go.... He hugs her tightly (someone is not ready to be gone) and tries to make her laugh.

-

When the door closed behind him, all she did was smile and smile and smile....

("We're making this all so sad!" He exaggerated. "It's dramatic." He narrowed his eyes at her, "or you're Zeus?")

-

OF TEARS AND TRAGEDY

He thinks he has never seen Chiron like this.

Eyes are the windows to the soul, telling so much and nothing at once. There are a few things he is proud of, one being the ability to see someone by the look in their eyes.

When he first met his teacher, he thought how he had eyes that seemed to have seen too much. Now, when he is meeting him for the first time since the end of the Giant war, he thinks how he looks as if he has seen enough.

It is like nothing can surprise him anymore, but the universe still found its ways.

-

Chiron ran fast towards the camp entrance when he heard the shouts. (And he also caught murmurs of "Percy's here!", or "he would know....", or "Nothing will change.", or "He cannot know any more than us.") As he approached near the hill, he could finally see the figure hurriedly making way, eyes set in the direction that led to the Big House.

He was alone. Chiron's heart ached.

"My boy!" he called, not letting himself think. (Not drowning in the memories, the past, and the possibility of 'what if...?' kept him anchored to the alive, present, and real)

The figure turned and green eyes focused on him. Then the boy ran.

He only reached a little above his waist but when he hugged him tight, Chiron saw him taller than ever.

His shoulder shook, his skin was warm, and eyes bloodshot. The boy sagged in his hold and the tense shoulders relaxed, his sobs echoed in his mind and Chiron realized it was the first time he had seen him crying.

(A boy no more than 16. It was no time for war when he was thrusted into one, told that there was a prophecy which shall mark his end.)

And he never cried. Oh, how Chiron had failed.

Chiron let himself shed tears as well. (He had let himself drown in finding alive, present and, real so much that he didn't succeed to just be and see.)

"I'm here, my son. I'm here. I'm here. I promise, I'm here, as I should have been. Oh, gods forgive me. I didn't realize. I'm here. I'm here."

-

The Gates of Olympus were closed, he already knew before he was told. Zeus feared the unknown, as he should, but his paranoia forced him to turn blind eyes towards what should be done.

(Maybe that was why his fear for the Protogenos Nyx was known. She was the Night. Beautiful, serene, calm, cold, dark, mysterious.)

Zeus was a paranoid king. His father was not.

Answers were near. Answers were at home.

𑁍A reference𑁍
'When the door closed behind him, all she did was smile and smile and smile....'
"But all I said was, see you soon, Amma,
all I did was smile and smile and smile...."
- "My Mother at Sixty-six", Kamala Das

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