Safe in the Black Sand

7

I speed through downtown New Haven, racing through yellow lights across the nine squares of an Englishman's attempted utopia—a vibrant cluster of churches, banks, and municipal buildings, including the library where Mom and Dad used to take me and Angelica every Sunday after breakfast.

Dad peeks out the living room window as I pull in the driveway. He comes outside to greet me. I haven't planned how to break the news.

He speaks first. "I thought you'd come."

Mom must have called. He spreads his arms and starts toward me. I flinch. He hugs me, squeezing hard. Dad rarely hugs. When we part, he's crying. Then I start crying. We hug again, this time for ten full seconds. It's got to be a record for us.

"We need to go to the hospital," I say, choosing to be blunt. "Angelica's been hurt. Badly."

Dad looks down in anger. "It wasn't an accident. Someone hurt her. On purpose."

I look to see if the neighbors are out, lowering my voice. "Who told you that? Did Mom call?"

Dad looks left then right, paranoid. "Before I went to bed last night I was contacted," he tells me. He steps closer and speaks low. "Ms. Jakintsu told me something bad was coming."

I exhale in frustration, sighing like Mom.

"Now wait a minute," Dad says, grabbing me by the shoulders. "You think Ms. Jakintsu isn't real. I know that. But what if you just let her be real, for Angelica's sake, just for today."

"Why today?" I ask, confused. "And why for Angelica's sake?"

"Ms. Jakintsu may be able to help Angelica. And time is short."

I decide to appease him, knowing this could be Dad's way of processing all this. "Fine. Take me to her."

Dad is visibly shocked by my compliance.

"Where is she?" I press. "Does she still live in East Rock like she did when I was young?"

Over two decades' worth of Jakintsu stories resurface in my mind. 

"Yes," Dad says. "Same house, right here in the neighborhood." 

No use trying to coax him back to reality. I eventually need to get us both to the hospital. But Angelica's face, those stitches—there's time for a detour. I'll take anything over reality.

"It's nearby?" I ask.

"What?"

"Ms. Jakintsu's place. It's close?"

"Yes—Sorry," Dad says. "I'm not used to hearing you talk about her like she's real."

Me neither.

"Let's go," I say.

"Jax, wait." Dad grabs my arm as I turn to leave. "You're sure about this? If you're going to do this, you need to take it seriously. This isn't a game."

I yank my arm out of his grasp. "I want to meet her," I say. "But here's the deal: If she's not there when we get to her house, we'll just go straight to the hospital. Agreed?"

It might be easier for him to face Angelica once he gets Ms. Jakintsu out of his mind. It's not enough for me to say there's no such person—not today. I've been telling him that since I was a kid. Everyone has. Maybe he needs her. Besides, I don't have the energy for a tug of war over what's real.

"We'll take my car," I say, attempting an even tone through my impatience. 

"I hope she's home," Dad says nervously. No one likes to be proven wrong. "Our visits are usually planned. I don't just drop in whenever I feel like it. She always invites me. She sees many people, Jax. She might be busy with another client..."