The thought of his lips touching mine made me ache,
Ache for the perfect story that was ripped from my reach
Pulled out of me by the strength of 1000 raging bulls
Or really just one selfish, pathetic man
I wish a kiss could be so gentle.
But the memories burn my skin
Rub my chest, steal my breath
The places where you touched me,
My heart,
My soul
Are aching
To feel safe
You have taken so much and given nothing in return
You are the master of the demons chasing me
Yet you are free to walk,
As if you hadn't committed rape
Against me
When I was 17
I never felt loved by your hands that touched me.
Pulled and squished my gentle flesh
Left bruises on my body with your teeth
Even when I asked you to stop,
To be gentle
It moved so fast
I wish I had been brave enough to scream
To Rip you off my flesh and run
But I pretended that nothing was wrong
I was scared of admitting what you'd taken from me
So I pretended I was happy
I didn't want to let go of my fairytale dream
And maybe I didn't deserve a fairytale but I definitely deserved a lot fucking more than what you offered me.
Ongoing torment and pain,
Shaking limbs,
A Tear in my heart that never repairs no matter how many times I try.
You are the worst thing to ever happen to me
