Devakshi One-shots/Drabbles/Short stories

The Lost Years (Part 1)

This will be a short story. My version of Devakshi's seven lost years, requested by my readers. I won't be able to update very frequently, too many things going on in life. I hope you all will bear with me!

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Sonakshi hung up the phone with the broker. The apartment she had finalized will be available from next month onwards and then her family will be able to move out of Jatin's place.

It had been a month since her marriage, her world and her life collapsed. That painful night, after getting back from Dev's farmhouse, she had called Jatin in Kolkata and made arrangements to get her family out of Delhi. Withdrawing whatever money was left from her account, Sonakshi had booked tickets to Kolkata. She had maintained the façade of strength for her parents and her grandmother. That hadn't been the time to mourn her relationship, her heartbreak or the devastation that had wrapped her tightly in its arms. One day, that time will come, the time when she will cry her whole heart out until she became empty, as empty as the black sky she was staring at, from the window.

Ever since landing in Kolkata, she had been trying to find a new job, had gone for several interviews and she was hoping to hear the final decision from one hospital. It would be a very good opportunity and she hoped they would offer her the position. Things would be a lot less complicated then. She also wondered how to repay Jatin for everything that he had done to help her and her family. That night's events had taken a severe toll on Baba's health. His blood pressure shot up and he had to be hospitalized when they reached Kolkata. They had been staying in Jatin's house while she made rounds of the hospital and try to find a job. Saurabh Dada had also been trying to find work, but he had had no luck so far. Jatin, of course didn't mind and always insisted that they could stay for as long as they needed. His wife had passed on the year before and he said that the loneliness of his place was eased by all of them being there. He had threatened to cut all ties with her if she ever thanked him, but still, it was a huge favor, whether he admitted it or not. She would always be grateful to him.

She breathed in deeply when a wave of nausea hit her, making her run to the bathroom. She finished, washed herself and settled down right there next to the toilet, too tired to move. What was happening? She had been nauseous for the past few days. She had assumed it was some food she had eaten, but the frequency and the intensity of the nausea seemed to be increasing. Maybe she ought to get herself tested, probably it was some stomach bug, or infection. Maybe Kolkata's water wasn't suiting her much. Maybe it was the stress of the past few weeks. Yeah, that is probably it. Stress and anxiety can trigger nausea. Most likely, that is also be the reason for her period being late a few days.

She frowned and sat up instantly, halting the flow of her thoughts and rewinding the one that had just occurred to her.

She was nauseous and her period was late. She did a quick mental calculation of the last time she and Dev had been intimate. Shimla. Their bitter fight. The passionate sex that followed.

It had been a month. She calculated further. She was about 10 days late. That fit the timeline.

A sudden chill filled her being. Was it possible? Could she be? Was she?

The fertility specialist had said that she was having trouble conceiving because of her physical condition as well as the fact that she was stressed. But at this time, her stress levels were much higher. Then how? No. That's probably not it. No. She certainly couldn't go into those terrible feelings again, the feeling of being inadequate, being helpless, of somehow being considered less of a woman by his family simply because she couldn't conceive. She didn't want to revisit all of that again. She was just overthinking this. Somewhere, her desire to become a mother was just playing havoc with logic. She needed to come to terms with reality. She had a medical condition and she may never conceive a child. She may never become a mother. That was the hard fact. Maybe that was for the best, even. Her marriage had broken down, Dev was no longer in her life. The presence of a child would have made this so much harder. This was better. Yes, she just needed to convince her heart.