i hate you | matt sturniolo

two

"i've done a lot of things wrong, loving you being one."

TW: mental abuse

matt and i used to date in our sophomore year of high school. people said we were such a cute couple. everyone wanted to be like a couple like us.

as a young girl, i was basically in love with him. that was a mistake.

during the time, i was in my worst state ever. my mom and i would fight almost everyday. i hated when we fought, she would always make up a reason to start a fight.

she would always make sure to tell me 'you're the worst daughter ever' or 'i wish i never had you'.

middle of my sophomore year she ended up leaving me and my father.

as much i was relief of the mental abuse i was going through, i went into a depression state. i blocked everyone out, including matt.

i felt so bad, i pushed everyone i loved away.

the moment i found out what happened, my heart shattered. i feel to the ground, i was too mentally tired to sob but i was heart broken.

matt kissed another girl and was with her.

i knew i was pushing him away, but i still loved him.

incoming call from nick

"lorelai, are you okay?"

"hello?"

"please answer me"

"yes" i answered in a tired voice.

"oh i'm so sorry"

"i didn't know he did that"

"it's my fault."

"i pushed him away"

"i love him nick. i do"

"i know you do lai"

"how about you come over right now. don't worry matt isn't here. it's just me here"

i hesitated for a bit.

"okay"

"awesome, remember i love you and always will. i'm here for you lai"

"i know nick and i love you so much too"

"i'll be there in a bit"

"okay i'll see you"

"bye"

call ended

i sighed.

i got up from my bed and walked over to my mirror. i stood there, looking at myself.

'you are enough.'

i repeated to myself.

i just slipped on some sweats and a hoodie. i opened my door and walked downstairs.

"hi dad, i'm going to go over to the sturniolos" i said  loud enough for him to hear from the living room.

"alright honey! be safe please and i love you" he yelled back as he was watching a football game.

i walked out the door and walked to my car. i started the car and drove to the house.

if only i just stayed home.

author notes!

i hope this one is better! it's currently like 12am and i can't fall asleep so i'm writing lmao.