EJ

Chapter 2: my disguise

The disguise was to be much more than merely dressing up, it was to be a full change. I was to undergo a conversion to a female for the coming school year.

Dad said, "Otherwise, you will be found out."

I don't know how Dad arranged it (bribery probably), but a process that I'm sure should have taken months was all over within a week. I had a gender dysphoria diagnosis and had been given my first lot of injections.

My father assured me that all the changes could be undone at the end of the year. Cold comfort indeed.

I seriously considered reporting him for child abuse, but what would happen to me; my dream of becoming a concert pianist would almost certainly be shattered.

Could I appeal to my mother? No, she had disappeared - Dad thought that she had probably left the country with her lover. Relatives? No, only a few distant ones we hardly knew. Friends? No likely candidates.

I got girls clothes, make-up, accessories and all the other stuff women regard as necessary. I was given training for my speech, posture, walking, sitting, gestures, etc, and, of course in make-up application, doing my hair, fashion styles and how to dress properly.

I still had six weeks left at my current school so I continued to attend as myself, a male. Outside of school, I was expected to dress as a girl and practise my girl behaviour.

Dad had reworked his schedule so that he wasn't away much during the period prior to the start of the new school year. Consequently, he was only away a few times for two or three nights. On those occasions I went into respite care at a youth hostel. Hated it.

This was more incentive driving me towards the best-of-a-bad-lot Wessex solution.

When the school holidays began, Dad gave me the option of staying home on those days when my trainers were coming around, or going to the hostel.

A no-brainer. "Dad, can you get at least one of my trainers to come around every weekday so that I can stay at home?"

"Sure."

I was defeated. I might as well do my best to reduce the chances of anyone at Wessex penetrating my disguise. I had realised that if I was discovered and chucked out, then it would be foster care at the farm for me.

I should have mentioned at the start, my name is Jodie Kent. Conveniently, Jodie works for both male and female so no need for a name change.

Physically, I also 'fitted the bill' being lightly built and fine-featured.

I don't know what Dad did about the documentation for my enrolment at Wessex, he must have somehow got around any references to my gender as male.

My initial series of injections was complete and I now had a patch or implant to supply my hormones. It would last at least six months and possibly the whole twelve.

Like it or not, I had made great progress with my conversion and was becoming confident in my female guise.

My father was being nicer to me. I think that he may have been having misgivings about what he was doing to me, and for the last few weeks of the holidays he started taking me out: lunches and dinners. I handled it all as his 'daughter' without any trouble and, somewhat to my chagrin, usually enjoyed myself.