when the werewolves collide

11

YN'S POV
      Being out of control might be fun sometimes. On my way home I let my supernatural instincts take over. It was one of the best things I have ever done. I just run through the woods in a wolf form for hours, never intending to go home. At some point I had lost every inch of human instincts I had. I was truly like a real wolf, no differences, wild, alerted, aware of all my surroundings, a constant search for fresh blood, animal or human, it didn't really matter to me, but above all I felt free like nothing could happen, like if I stay like this for ever I will have the happiness I have been looking for so many years. No school, no hunters, no troubles with the authorities, no bullshit with friends and no limits on how and how much I use of my powers. This way I would be an animal without hurting memories of dead parents, friends leaving for a different country, friends being used by evil ancient spirits or friends blinding themselves to save everyone. I would be just like Malia was. Do I want it? Yes absolutely, but it's hard to maintain this condition for more than a few hours. But I think with some practice I could indeed succeed in staying like this for over a year!
       What really concerns me is why I want it to happen? Why do I feel the need to be like this? I haven't been feeling like myself for a long time. I have never lost my control so easily and never have had a panic attack without any reason.  But control isn't the only thing that I am missing on, memories as well. I have this blank time frame from the time we were fighting the dreg doctors, I was told I was kidnapped by them for experiments but no one knows what they truly did to me. I was either blacked out the whole time or my memories were erased. The only one that knows exactly what happened, is Theo and he will not tell me for the life of his. The only thing he says is that the only thing that matters is that I am ok and safe. But still things don't add up. There are times that are blank in my mind. It's like I experience time differently than before. Everything feels so forced and moving so fast. Even my feelings for Theo, if I ever had any, feel forced like there is no time frame from us being friends and us being whatever we are now.
      My thoughts are cut off by the noises that were coming out of the house. I thought no on was home.... Shit now how am I supposed to put my plan at auction?? I walk slowly and carefully. I open the door as lightly as possible. For my good luck it was only Issac home and he was in the shower. The noises were the music he had put on. Agh classic Issac and I thought he was over that habit of his, guess he hasn't changed at all. I make sure to lighten up my steps trying not to make the wood do the squeaky sound it usually does. I pass past the bathroom and in our room. Before I put myself in animal form I have to finish some business first. I pack as many of my stuff as I can fit in a bag. As I was packing I stubble across a necklace Stiles had given me a long time ago. Just when we were freshmen with the promise to take me to prom if both of us were as single as we were that day. Pretty sure I made him promise to marry me if we don't have relationships on our 30s. Gosh stupid little young kids. I am not going to stick around for prom anyways but I guess I can have  something to remind me of my family. I looked further in my stuff and found old photos with the three of us, when we were little and we were playing with Scott's German Shepherd. She was the best dog , always friendly and playful, I cried for hours when they told me what happened to her. We were all so happy in the photos, smiling, sitting on the grass , hugging the dog and holding ice cream cones. And look at us now, too broken to be truly happy, putting on a fake smile for pictures, too hurt by the lose we have felt over this short time span, others felt it more than the rest. Others expressed their feelings and worked out their problems. Others just ignored their problems, isolated themselves, built these huge walls around them that only a few can break. But childhood is over, we are soon to be adults and I am planning on leaving the only people that cared for me. The only people I can call family.
"Going somewhere?" I heard a confused voice from behind me and I turn to see Issac with a towel around his whips and neck.
"No.... just going through my old stuff" I say trying to cover my backpack
"You really think you can fool me Y/N"
He said with a smirk
Y: why would I lie to you?
I: look I might be gone for a long time but that doesn't change the fact that we grew up together and I can read you like an open book
Y: if you were good at it, you would believe me
I: the fact that you were trying to snick in the house doesn't really help me do that
Y: what are you talking about? I-I ..... I will not try to explain myself to you. If you want to believe me, good for you but I am not going to give you information about my whereabouts like you are my parent
I: ok I believe you, but if the others ask, I will tell them everything
Y: D-
St: Y/N ! There you are! We have been looking for you the past 20 minutes. Nice outfit Issac
I: thanks?
Y: what are you talking about? I left the car at least 4 hours ago
Sc: you certainly did not. It's been roughly one hour
Y: that can't be right. I was wondering in the woods for so long!
T: I guess you lost track of time
I: ok but why is everyone in here? Can't you go downstairs so I can get dressed?!
*going downstairs *
Y: what the fuck is happening to me?