Prologue
My eyes darted to a full-body mirror on my front. I smiled at my reflection. I wear a long and white off-shoulder wedding gown that exposed too much of my skin.
I smiled bitterly. I looked incredibly beautiful of my gown.
I started to trace every corner of my face. The light make-up and red lipstick was obviously good on me. I looked like a younger version of my mom that wore the same gown with different embroidery.
I know that married is sacred but I can't feel any happiness within me. How can I be happy if this was just a sake of my family business? I'm only just 18 years old but look, I am now wearing a wedding gown. And I'm not yet ready to get married that the young age. My family's sacrifice me as a pay to their debt. Wtf?! I'm their only child for pete's sake!
How can they so cruel to me. How can they steal my freedom from me? They always said that It's for my own sake but no, it's not. I want to live freely just like the teenager's in my age. Gusto ko lang naman na mabuhay ng malaya. Ayoko pang matali sa hindi kilalang lalaki at lalong-lalo na sa hindi ko mahal.
I don't want to be knotted to the person that I didn't know. Ni mismong pangalan nito ay hindi ko alam kaya paano ako mapanatag sa ganitong sitwasyon kahit ni isang impormasyon tungkol sa lalaking papakasalan ko ay wala akong alam? All I know that he's 7 years older than me and I'm too young for him!
Gracious. I'm not yet ready for this. Gusto ko pang libutin ang ibat-ibang bansa sa asya pagkatapos ko mag-aral bilang isang flight attendant. Pero ano ang magagawa ko kung sa mismong birthday magaganap ang kasal ko? Should I feel happy because It was my birthday pero kabaliktaran naman ang nararamdamam ko. I felt sad. How can they ruined my 18th birthday? This day should me my debut but here I am, wearing a magnificent gown that I ever seen.
"Ethany?" I blinked as I heard my mother called my name. Hindi ko ito binigyan nang pansin dahil masama pa rin ang loob ko sa naging desisyon nila sa buhay ko. I love them. I really do pero hindi ko masikmura na kaya ko nilang ipagpalit para matubos mula sa pagkalugmok ang kompaniya namin. That's why I obeyed them because I love them.
"Miss Ethany?" pukaw pansin sa akin ng make-up artist na nasa harapan ko na pala. Blankong tingin naman ang iginawad ko sa kaniya habang siya naman ay malapad na nakangiti sa'kin na para bang excited siya sa kahinatnan sa kasal na magaganap. Napairap naman ako sa sarili ng hindi ko man lang masuklian ang ngiting pinapakita niya sa'kin.
Narinig ko naman ang pagbuntong hininga ni mom kaya napatingin ako sa kaniya, "You should be ready." sabi nito habang nakangiting tiningnan ang kabuuan ko. She looks happy while I'm frowing.
"Really mom? Parang binibenta niyo na'ko sa lalaking papakasalan ko." ismid ko dito at muling tiningnan ang mukha ko mula sa repleksyon.
My mom is in mid 40's. She looks young at her age. She looks sophisticated in every way kaya hindi talaga makikitang matanda na pala ito. She still had a baby face kaya nagmukhang nasa 20's palang ito. No wrinkles or anything in her face. Nakasuot ito ng isang white fitted dress that exposed her curves. She's incredibly sexy. Sexier than me.
Wala naman nagbago sa reaksyon niya. Masaya parin itong nakatingin mula sa repleksyon ko. "He's good and I know that he can take care of you." kampanting sabi nito kaya lihim akong napairap. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang pinakain ng lalaking iyon para maging ganito ka kampante ang magulang ko na matali ako sa kaniya.
I let out a long breath before I slowly glance at her direction. She's lightly touching my hair. "No one can tale care of myself aside from me. I can take care of myself without someone's help, even that guy that soon to be my husband."
