Kiss & Clientele

Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten
Twice Shy Frontwoman caught kissing mystery man.
The headline was plain as day as Mr. Kim slid the ipad across the table.  Nora had known this day would come, but knew not how to get herself out of it.  He peered at her over the top of his reading glasses, burning her with his gaze.  After several deep breaths he managed to growl out, "care to explain?"  She didn't even need to read the article to know the when and why of the situation.  Her options were to fight, deny, or grovel...
   As she studied the picture in question, she zoomed in on the cleverly shrouded man.  She knew, without having seen the badge dangling from his neck, that it was Jin Jae-ho - her ex.  That night, some days after returning from Japan, he bumped into Ari at the bar.  They shared a couple of drinks, the alcohol giving them both the courage to say what had long needed to be said.  The kiss was a simple goodbye between former lovers who received the closure they desperately needed.  It seemed just as her client found peace, everything was being flipped around.  The frenzy this would create would undoubtedly affect her career.  However, Jae remained nameless, his identity clearly being protected by the media.  It infuriated the manager that, just as it was in the states, women were faulted for the things that men were praised for.
"It's exactly what it looks like, sir."  She stated bluntly, annoyed that this was even an issue to begin with.
"I don't need you to confirm what I'm seeing, what the whole country is now seeing."  He snapped.  "I need you to tell me why YOU let it happen?"  The heavy emphasis on the word, you, sent heat surging through her body.  He tore into her, insulting her intelligence and ability to perform the job he once highly praised her for.  With every second that passed she grew increasingly more angry, the lessons of Ava DiMarco playing on a loop in her head. 
"More than anything, kid, don't be afraid to take up space and fight for what you believe is right."  As Mr. Kim berated her, the voice of her former mentor rose above and moved her to stand.
   Slamming her hands down on the table, Nora commanded the executives attention.  She thrust the ipad back at him and began to make her way over to his side.
"You know, it's always men like YOU who see people as money trees that they can just shake and shake until every last dime has dropped."  She hovered over him, staring directly into his eyes.  He looked back at her, motionless and riddled with fear.  She had pounced on him like a malnourished tiger seeing it's first prey.  "Men like you think they can manipulate and control with policies and binding contracts while grossly misusing and abusing those beneath you.  Men like you think you can recruit children and groom them into being subservient little popstars, then gaslight them well into adulthood as they make you millions."  He leaned back in his chair, hoping and praying there was a way to wriggle out of the uncomfortable confrontation.  The businessman feared at any moment things could turn physical.  He shakily reached into his jacket pocket to retrieve his phone just for her to snatch it away.  "No, let me, I insist."  She said with a sick smile.  After punching in a number and waiting on the other end to pick up, the manager demanded security to be sent to the boardroom.  She hung up, dropped the phone in front of her victim, and walked to the door.  Turning back to him, she left him with one final statement.  "I don't fuck with men like you, Mr. Kim, but I sure as hell make them pay.  I quit."
   The hours to follow were chaos, with the termination of her employment she needed to make some decisions and make them quickly at that.  More importantly, Nora needed to reach out to her former clients before the truth could be misconstrued.
Nora [10:52am]: I want you all to hear this from me first, I am no longer senior management for HYPE. I quit. I have to pack and figure out whether to stay or move back to NYC, but I'd like to disclose everything ASAP. Can anyone meet for a late dinner tonight?
From her balcony, Nora looked out over a city that she barely knew.  There was still so much left for her to see and explore, but was it even worth staying?  As her phone came to life with message after message, so did the realization that if she left she would lose more than gain.
Felix [11:10am]: Chan, Changbin, and I are headed your way.
Changbin [11:11am]: Keep your head up, Wallstreet.
Ari [11:13am]: Ms. H, I'm so sorry. I'm coming over too.
The almost instant show of support made her want to break down and cry.
   Breaking her brief moment of reflection was a repetitive thud coming from the front door.  She collected herself and sprinted through the livingroom to answer its insistent call.  Unlocking the door, she opened it to find Jisung doubled over and out of breath.  Seeing him felt like seeing a ghost.
"I came as fast as I could."  He said, panting between each word.  She remained silent, looking him up and down.  He wore black joggers, a t-shirt, and had a beanie concealing his hair.  She clearly saw the small mole beneath his cheek.  His eyes looked small and sleepy as he lifted his head to look at her.  There must have been something in the way she looked at him, because he started to ramble.  "We had a late call time today, so I was sleeping in, which is why I look like crap but as soon as I got your message I was worried and -"
"Just stop."  She muttered, staring at him blankly.
"Nora, I'm -"
"Sorry?"
"Yes."
"Don't you think it's a little too late for that?"  Her voice was a hiss, shooting heartbroken venom at him.  Appearing behind him, Ari glared at him with eyes like daggers.
"You need to leave."  She stamped her foot as if it would make him disappear.  When he didn't immediately obey she shouted, "now!"  Binna, Hana, and Nari stood close by ready to pounce.
"Oh shit!"  Changbin yelled from way back in the newly formed crowd. "Hans about to get beat up by girls!"  Whipping around, Ari shot a look that made the rapper instantly pipe down. 
"You're next."  Nari, the smallest and most docile member, snarled back at him.  Under different circumstances the interaction would have made Nora erupt with laughter, but it was currently too much for her to handle.
   Felix saw her pained expression and darting eyes, and he elbowed at Chan's side.
"We've got to break this up, she's overwhelmed."  He informed the leader, who promptly sprang into action.
"Ladies, if you would attend to Ms. Halston, that would be awesome."  The girls of Twice Shy pushed past Han and escorted Nora to the bedroom.  Chan and the guys began packing up boxes and piling them by the front door.
   When Minho, Hyunjin, Seungmin, and I.N showed up, they had all but finished.  Nora and the girls had completed the bedroom, bathroom, and closets and now silently worked alongside their nemesis, Han.  The former manager couldn't determine whether he was admirable or idiotic for sticking around.  Too tired to go out, she ordered delivery and made sure to include plenty of drinks.  Together, everyone sat around to eat and drink - the sight of which was bittersweet.  One bottle of soju in, and Nora began to tell them of her meeting with Mr. Kim.  She spared no details and spoke to them not as their manager but as a friend. 
   Dipping into the earliest hours of the morning, most everyone had succumbed to alcohol induced sleep.  Nora had snuck outside to enjoy the quiet and the still twinkling lights of Seoul.  She could see Namsan in the distance, a blue beacon in the night.  She kept thinking about Lee Min-Ho and all the times he must have been there for filming.  Of all the shows he's been in and all the gorgeous tv girlfriends he's had, was there ever a time when fiction bloomed into reality?  A moment where the words he said meant more than pre-written lines?  Perhaps her experience at the tower was also just movie magic?
   When the glass door slid open, the thought-consumed woman didn't even notice.  Her sight remained fixed as Jisung cautiously sank down in the adjacent chair.  He was well aware of the fact that she hated him.  She had every right to, but he found it hard to take his eyes off her.  Looking at her now, he found it difficult to connect her to the woman he first met.  The short, fiery hair suited her in many ways.  Once of which being the way it made her blue eyes glow against the deep, burnt orange tresses.  When he looked at her now, it felt as if the Nora he knew and loved had finally won.
   Not knowing what the hours ahead might hold, Han felt an urgent need to try and make things right.  He didn't expect forgiveness, nor did he anticipate the two of them ever being close again, but he knew this was the right thing to do.  Taking a deep breath in, he prepared himself for the second hardest thing he's ever had to do.
"Nora?"  Her name tumbled out of his mouth awkwardly.  She jumped, startled by his presence, but did not turn to look at him.
"What?"  She stood and made her way to the railing, completely turning her back.  He had no right to touch, hold, or kiss her but every fibre of his being was yearning for her.  Remaining seated felt wrong, it felt like hiding.  So, he stood but remained in the background.  Wringing his hands nervously, he found it in himself to continue.
"I'm sorry -"
"Couldn't you have said this 4 months ago?"  She whipped around as if she were ready to attack.  It should have made him feel more nervous, but he only felt more compelled to pull her close.  "What the fuck, Jisung?  Will you at least tell me why? Because I've spent the last 124 days in a constant state of wondering."
"I messed up. Massively.  I know I hurt you, I know I made you suffer, and now I have to live with the weight of all of my mistakes. I don't expect your forgiveness and I certainly don't feel like I deserve anything less than your hatred."  Despite the nature of their words, the two slowly gravitated toward one another.  The space between them becoming less and less.
   Nora hated herself for looking at him and seeing someone she missed, someone she deeply cared for, and someone she often dreamed about having back.  She wanted to hate him, but that would only be a front for how she really felt.
"I don't want to hear the expectations you have for me."  Like a wounded animal, she snapped and snarled at the person before her.  Rightfully so, for he was the negligent driver that had run her over.
"I didn't -" He paused, scrambling for the right thing to say. "I'm sorry."  He exasperatedly ran a hand through his thick, straight hair.  His eyes shifted upward to meet her gaze.  She looked scared, panicked, and he could strongly relate.
   Jisung hadn't felt anything since the moment he abandoned Nora on the rooftop.  There were moments when he wished he could lash out and scream, or break down into a sobbing mess.  Even when he laughed, it wasn't something he actually felt.  It was just a recollection of a once familiar phenomenon.  When he saw her for the first time since their break-up, there was a spark.  The slightest flame of jealousy and anger flicked on like a lighter.  Her text message,however, was a molotov cocktail that consumed him from the inside out.  All at once every memory he shared with her swept over him in a furious blaze.  It consumed every conscious and subconscious barrier he had built to block out the feelings he feared.
   Sitting back down, he leaned forward and caught his head with his hands.  As he wept, Nora stood there being torn in two.
"I am such a coward."  He began, every word forced out from beneath a sob.  "There's nothing else I can say, there's no other reason why I did what I did.  I realized I was in love with you and it terrified me."  The confession made Nora feel as though she had been pushed from the balcony and began to free fall.  Though her physical body stood before him, her heart had jumped from the 14th floor.  "I had always wanted to experience that, and the second I did I couldn't handle it."  He lifted his tear-soaked face and looked out into the still dark sky.  "When you were reassigned I felt my fear was justified. I used it as a crutch to support my own cowardice and I hate myself for it."
   There was a weight that came with knowing his reason, and an immense urge to go to him and hold him tightly in her arms.  Although she had been hurt by him, she also hurt for him.  Being afraid of new things or life changes is normal, she remembered being absolutely terrified of entering a relationship with him in the first place.  However, she never wanted to live her life lost in what-ifs.  To her, Jisung was worth the risk, and feeling like she wasn't worth it to him stung.
"Did I do something to make you feel like you couldn't talk to me about it?"  There was a lump in her throat that caused the words to come out stiff and staccato.  For the first time in what felt like forever, he looked up at her.
"No, not at all."  He said sternly, hoping to emphasize the error of his ways. 
   Nora slid into the chair beside him, moving her hand to lay across his.  Just making contact with him resurfaced that desperate feeling.  She slowly rubbed her thumb over the back of his hand as he looked at her with eyes full of remorse.
"Han Jisung, you're very important to me."  She spoke softly as tiny tears fell down her cheeks.  "But it would be very foolish to try and recreate what we once had."  He nodded along in heartbroken agreement.  "I now understand why you left the way you did, and I appreciate you having the courage to finally tell me.  Fear is something I am well acquainted with.  Fear of not being enough, not being taken seriously.  Fear of how others may perceive me."  Becoming hard to talk through the tears, the pair shared a moment of silence.  The sun began to float above the horizon, painting the sky in hues of gold and pink.  Even as beautiful as it was, it did not avert their gaze.  They remained fixated upon one another.
   A new day had begun and a new story was soon to unfold for the both of them.  Nora knew not where she would go or what she would do, but she looked forward to it being a genuine pursuit.
"Can we start over?"  She asked, her eyes filling with the first rays of sun. "Could we be friends again? I can't imagine life without you."  The word, friends, felt like a knife stabbed and twisting in his side.  His feelings for her would always be something more, but he recognized that her trust had been broken.
"Whatever you decide to do, wherever life takes you, I will always be in your corner." His words were genuine, but his smile was not.  Nora rose, pulling him to his feet to join her.  Arms folded around him, her embrace felt warmer than the summer day waking before them.