"i'm not scared of you, or the blood you have on your hands, or the fear you hide behind your knuckles. you're quiet, and naive, yet you've seen all the dangerous depths of the world. it makes you dark, disruptive. nevertheless, i cannot be scared o...
I remember the first time I was afraid my father would do something to you
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(all things written in this chapter are purely fictional. none of which is written here is factually accurate in any way)
She was on the surgery bed, her breaths obviously trembling. I stood right beside her as the doctors words all become a string of incoherent mumbling. She seemed to be nodding, but the concern in heart was throbbing so hard to the point it became painful.
"...may corrupt the brain tumour"
"What?" I whipped my head towards the doctor the moment his words were becoming clear again.
"Besides injecting the drug into her corneal, there may be major side effects to this surgery. She is going to be exposed to a lot of foreign things the moment this surgery is done, so in order for her brain to not dysfunction, we will need to begin a more risky procedure. We do need to implant a platinum-iridium device into her brain for safe keeping. Gaps in her memory may appear for a short period of time and we cannot guarantee how long that gap may stay for, in most cases, only a couple hours or up one or two days."
"Can he stay?" Sooah's voice flooded into the conversation, her hand gently scraping against my sleeve "Especially under the conditions that I may lose my memory, I don't want to lose anything with him"
My eyes flickered to the doctor hopefully. He chewed his lip, glancing between us two. A glimmer of admiration for youth sparked in his irises. Maybe that's how people viewed the youth: impulsive but willing to do anything for love.
"I know people can bring guitars and even a dog into the surgical room. Surely that could be applied to us too" She pleaded.
"You do understand that the pain that the patient has to go through to stay conscious during the surgery is unexplainable, right" The doctor continued to remain uncertain
"Soo-" I tried to convince her not to. I didn't want her to be in pain. Plus, even if she lost parts of her memory, it'll only be short-term, right? I'll find my way back to her, always.
"I don't want to take the bargain of losing him, doctor" She spoke and I swore my heart melted. Even the simplest of words would send me into a turmoil.
With that, the doctor agreed.
•••
This procedure was painful. I clasped her hand tightly, pressed against my cheek as I couldn't help but let a tear splash against her hand. This excruciating feeling of waiting while one's girlfriends body is getting cut open wasn't pleasant.
I could feel her thumb weakly stroke my knuckle, as if the energy had been stripped out of her entirely. I shouldn't have agreed to stay during the surgery. She would be in so much less pain if I didn't.
"You'll be OK" I whispered "You have to be"
•••
"Don't move" I hushed, standing up and grabbing Sooah's phone for her. There is a couple days of recovery period for her eyes to fully heal, so now she has a bandage around her eye, meaning now she is 100% blind. The surgery went well, but I was still mortified, in fear that something would happen.
I passed her the phone, she clutched it, chuckling at my clumsiness.
"Can you get me a drink of water?" Sooah asked. I agreed, standing up with her drink bottle and scurrying out of the room. I was being extra careful with her; I knew the state of her fragility.
As I was getting her a cup of water, a familiar body passed me. A lean body, wrapped with a leather jacket. I could not pin point his face, but he seemed to so familiar. No, it wasn't quite his face that was familiar, or rather, his presence, his menacing aura.
Twisting the lid back onto the drink bottomless, I furrowed my eyebrows, ultimately deciding to dismiss the thought and head straight back to Sooah. The moment I walked back into Sooah's room, my heart dropped. There was the man, in full black leather, in front of the girl with a thick layer of bandaging over he eyes.
"Who the f-" I jerked his arm away from Sooah, dropping the drink bottle out of complete impulse. I saw his face. A face I had so despised for years of my life.
"Father" I let out a sharp exhale. Sooah hand was clutching the railing of the bed, her body clearly in a state of shock.
"What are you doing here" I hissed, pulled him towards me so he was further away from the girl.
"To visit your mother"
I chewed on my lips. My parents never worked well together, in fact, they got married because of money, and only money. Now that they've lost the money, they've lost the reason they're together in the first place. This just shows how fucking weak wealth is.
"Please stay away from her. I thought you were arrested" My eyes trembled against his eyes that were so many like mine I could see myself in his eyes.
"Oh?" His smirk was malicious "I have no need to be arrested. A couple drinks are nothing, Sicheng"
I scoffed, leaning close to his ear "I don't care what you do to me, but stay away from her. Touch her, and I'll destroy you"
My father didn't flinch, not even a single bit. Instead, he also laughed at this supposedly comedic occurrence.
"Why are you always scared of me?"
"Because you ruined my mother" I clenched my fist "I will never forget the moment you left"
"I sent money to your mother-"
"Don't even start" I was so close to throwing a punch at his face "She would not be on this hospital bed if it weren't for you"
"I did what I had to"
"What you had to do was stay with your family, not get lost in some sort of sick fantasy of yours"
