best friends? || billie eilish

5 - the backstory

it felt like i couldn't breathe for second. look, the playing her interviews and songs when i'm trying to drive in the car is one thing. having me bump into her at an event i was having a good time at is whole other story. literally kiss my ass universe.

"um rose, how have you been?" billie asks breaking the intense silence.

"i've uh, i've been pretty good... you?" i return the question fiddling with my fingers.

"i've been alright." she answers still staring me in the eye with an unreadable expression.

we just stare at eachother not knowing what to say. the silence is starting to put physical pressure on me and i feel like i can't breathe. i say i need to go to the bathroom and speed walk to it. i sit inside and try to breathe, i take out my phone and use my app with relaxation devices.

CAM'S POV

i sit on the couch and take a sip of water. i scoot next to rose's mom and give her a hug since she's crying watching rose walk out of the bus looking all pretty and shit, that's my best mf friend.

i look at one of the other parts of the screen and see billie eilish walking out of the bus.

"i didn't know billie was gonna be there, she looks really pretty." i say taking another sip of water.

"billie's there? i hope rose doesn't see her. it'll probably ruin her mood." rose's mom says putting the box of kleenex back on the table.

huh?

"what do you mean?" i ask turning to mrs. astríd (we're calling rose's mom that for the rest of the book.

"they used to be best friends, best friends is an understatement. they were inseparable," ms. astríd said turning to me. "but then they got into a huge argument."

~FLASHBACK~

ROSE'S POV

i slammed my keys on the table and took a step closer to billie.

"SO I'M AN ASSHOLE FOR FINALLY BEING CONFIDENT ENOUGH TO RELEASE THE SONG YOU LITERALLY TOLD ME I SHOULD RELEASE?" i yell being sick and tired of her shit.

"NO, YOUR AN ASSHOLE FOR DOING IT AFTER MY SONG GETS BIG AND USING ME TO BRING ATTENTION TO IT." billie yells back.

"SO BECAUSE I DECIDED TO ANNOUNCE IT BY POSTING THE VIDEO OF US HAVING FUN AND SINGING IT, I'M USING YOU?" i yell back with a mix of anger and confusion.

"YOU DID IT WITH ME IN THE BACKGROUND BECAUSE YOU WANTED IT TO ATTRACT MORE ATTENTION." she yells getting closer to me.

"I DID IT BECAUSE I WAS HAVING FUN WITH MY BEST FRIEND!" i yell getting even closer to her. she scoffs and looks away.

"best friends? maybe before. but now i might just be a clout generator for you." billie says looking back at me.

tears start to visibly fill my eyes. can't tell if they're tears of sadness because i feel like my best friend shoved a knife in my heart, or if they're tears of anger because after all this time she can even mutter those words.

"how the hell can you even say that. for 3 years i've stuck with you through some terrible shit. i stayed with you when michael asked you out to the dance and then took mia instead. i stayed with you when kristy stopped being your friend because you found out you were lesbian. i even stayed with you and reassured you after you were blaming yourself for an argument we had that, being completely honest, was your fault. i didn't have to do any of that. i did that because i fucking love you." i say, my voice being shaky because of me crying.