The Disillusion Mountains

Chapter 24

Regina's Journal
Myras
Jotun 27, 1813

    Father and I are once again together. Two years have aged him more than they should. When he looks at me I can tell he thinks the same. My face alone was a shock as the scars there didn't exist when he last saw me.    

    Father works in an inn as a bookkeeper. I was offered a position as a bar maiden but declined. Instead I found work as an assistant apothecary to an older woman called Estee Rigel. Her son and his family run the local paper. They have a few children close to my age and I often run errands to that house for Estee. Perhaps I will make friends. 

    I need friends but my limited understanding of this new language makes it difficult. Luckily Estee is fluent in Logosese. She says her grandson Royce has offered to teach me more Myrasian.

    When Mama gave me this journal she meant for me to write often. I haven't lived up to that expectation.  

    In fact I think it's time I put this away. Whenever I look at it all I see are wounds from a life I no longer have. Someday maybe I'll pick it up again when the wounds it reminds me of aren't so raw. 

Regina's Journal
Myras
Jur 30, 1820

    Am I destined for a life of brief joys amidst an ocean of miseries? 

    Royce is dead. Even with my skill I couldn't save him. The Towers have taken the entire town and turned it into a mine. They were only allowed to buy the land if all moved peacefully but some didn't. Royce and I included.    

    The other members of the council tried to appeal to the Towers for another solution but they wouldn't hear our pleas. Instead they set fire to the town with their hired men and shot all who fought back.      

    I didn't know it at the time but I was pregnant. That accounts for why my magic wasn't enough to save Royce. When a witch is pregnant the majority of her magic is infused into the baby. This leaves us with the ability for small spells every so often; from the moment I conceived I would never have had enough magic leftover to save my Royce. Magic doesn't quickly reappear in family lines once there is already a witch. That magic given to the baby makes time between witches in the family less. It would be a miracle if my child was capable of magic but the odds are against that outcome. 

    How will I manage without Royce? I cannot stay with his family for the Towers have put a price on my head as the last remaining council member opposed to the expansion of their property. I'm grateful to know of this bounty on my life as my friend Susa, who is a butler to the Towers told me of it. I saved the life of his child last year and he repaid me with a chance to save mine.

    I have retreated into the mountains. There is much magic here left over from years of warring clans. Traps and hexes are easily triggered. It's no wonder these mountains are rumored haunted and cursed.     

Regina's Journal
Myras
Morik 17, 1821

    The trap I had to set has kept us safe so far. Too many men began to journey to these mountains in search of me and one did find me. I nearly was killed along with Rosemarie who was just weeks from being born.  

    I've given birth to a daughter. She is Rosemarie Rigel. Royce and I had the same initials and I want our daughter to have them also. She looks so much like her father. She has his nose and dark skin with my violet eyes.                    

    Susa will be journeying back down the mountain now that I've given birth. His wife will stay a bit longer to watch over me. I wanted Susa to stay but he is right that his absence will be noticed if he's gone much longer. I'm grateful they were here for I wouldn't have survived this birth alone.

    Father came up the mountain for Rosemarie's birth. I am trying to convince him to stay. Now that Rosemarie is here I will not be able to continue taking from the Towers without someone to watch over her.   

Regina's Journal
Myras
Anglus 30, 1824

    Father doesn't want me to do it. He says if I do I will be no better than the soldiers who pushed us from our old home or the Towers who destroyed our new one.    

    The Towers haven't stopped their evil actions and are beginning to buy up businesses and land around the town. They assault and make those who refuse to give them what they want disappear. Many people are now supporting them because they've promised to bring prosperity to the town. Almost half the town now works for the family in some way and those who don't are living in fear that the eyes of the family will be cast on them next.       

    It's as if those who work for the Towers have forgotten what they did to the old town and either don't know or care that they are hurting people to extend their assets.

    This has led me to one conclusion. I can steal from them for the rest of eternity without truly damaging anything they have. The only way this will stop is if there are no Towers and soon I will make sure there aren't.        

Regina's Journal
Myras
Jur 3, 1824

    I couldn't do it.

    The Towers family was hosting a gala for themselves and their extended family. It provided the perfect opportunity to kill them all. I snuck into the venue and placed hex bags around it. I could activate their explosive power from a distance. With a few words they would be doomed to the hell of their own making. I know it's an effective technique as we used many times in the war.

    I was ready to carry out my plan when I saw a woman with her children arrive. There weren't supposed to be any children at this gala. She must have been a guest of the family from another town as I didn't recognize her.              

    It was her son that stopped me; a little boy with purple hair. He picked a flower for his mother and she gushed and thanked him as if he had given her the world. She ruffled his hair and he looked at her with the same love and admiration that Rosemarie does me.

    I used my magic to destroy the hex bags and went back to the mountains. There I had a crisis of conscience. I was so ready to destroy my enemies that I blinded myself to the servants and others who have done me no harm who were also there. I would have killed them all. The fact that those people have decided to serve the Towers doesn't make them guilty or deserving of the same fate.

    Even with that revelation there is a part of me that wishes I'd done it.       

    I'm sickened by my actions yet still thirsty for revenge.  

    It was this that led me to make the hardest decision of my life. I took Rosemarie and my father down to the meadow. I sent him ahead to bring Royce's parents to me. I have given them charge of my daughter and convinced Papa to leave with them.       

    I am a woman broken. I need to fix myself. Only then can I be a mother to Rosemarie.

    Is it possible to heal from this? Will my desire for revenge and inability to forgive and move on, forever separate me from all in life that truly matters?