Tired of giving into you

~6~

Vicki POV

When we get home from the theatre I head to my room. I have an ensuite so I go in there to shower. Whilst I'm in there I notice my razor. So many thoughts run-through my brain. Seeing him has made me feel so worthless. I grab it and sit down in the running shower. I pop out the blade and drag it along my arm. The blood oozing out makes me want to do it more. I carry on and carry on until my whole forearm and shower floor is covered in blood. I stand up and grab a face cloth and pat down my arm. I hop out of the shower and realise what I have done.

I wrap a towel around myself and make my way towards Frankie's room, as it is the closest, with tears running down my face. I open the door and see Frankie sitting there on her phone. "I've done something stupid" I say to her. She moves closer and I hold my arm out to her. She has a look and looks for permission before pulling me into a hug. "Oh Vicks. Why didn't you talk to us? We could've helped. Let's go get you cleaned up." I don't answer, instead I just stand up and allow Frankie to sort my arm out.

When she is done I head into my room and put my PJs on. I get into bed and fall straight asleep.

~the next morning~

I wake up and feel pain in my arm. I look at it and see a bandage. Then I remember last night. I am so embarrassed. I grab a hoodie and some leggings before going into my bathroom and getting ready. When I leave my room I go to the kitchen. I see Nat and Frankie both sitting there eating Coco pops. I sit in my place and grab the box. I put in one scoop of Coco pops and pour in some milk. I mix it around a bit and then slowly start eating them. "How are you today Vicki?" Frankie asks. I just shrug my shoulders, not really in the mood to talk. "It's ok Vicks. Don't feel bad. Maybe a day off will help. Take a mental health day?" Frankie says. I just nod. I really need a break. "I'm going back to bed. Can you let whoever know that I'm not coming in?" I say, aiming the last part at Nat. "Course I can. You relax Vicks." I nod and walk back to my room. I get back into my PJs and get into bed. I stare at the ceiling and slowly fall back asleep.

~that night~

Frankie and Nat have just got home from the show. I haven't moved from bed all day except for the essential necessities. I hear a knock on my door. "Come in" I say quietly. Frankie comes in. "Hey. I brought you the presents people left for you. How you doing?" She says, coming and sitting by my head on the bed. I just shrug my shoulders. Frankie strokes my hair. "You'll be alright. Can I check your arm?" Frankie asks. I nod and sit up. I pull my sleeve up and Frankie takes off the bandage. The bandage was really irritating earlier and I kept on trying to scratch my arm, causing the cuts to bleed slightly.

"Can I clean them?" She asks. I nod my head. "I'll be right back, give me a minute." She says and walks out. I look down at my arm. Why did I do it?

Frankie comes back with a fresh bandage and antiseptic wipes. She wiped down my arm, me hissing at the pain, before putting on a new bandage. She kisses my wrist. "One day you're going to look back at these and see them as a memory and see how far you've come. And you'll be proud of them" she whispers to me. I nod my head. I really do hope so. "Now sleep time. Do you want me to stay?" She asks. I nod my head. Frankie pulls off her shoes and gets comfy. I lay my head on her chest and she wraps her arms around me. I feel safe. I soon fall asleep.

Frankie POV

When Vicki falls asleep I untangle my arms and tuck her in. I make my way to my own room. I leave Vicki's door open slightly and mine open too, just so I can hear if she needs anything. I change into my pyjamas and lie down. I start to fall asleep.

I feel something for Vicki. I'm just not sure what.