Wisdom and War

Chapter Eleven

"Where is he?" I exclaimed as soon as I got back to headquarters. I was on a scouting trip with three Furas up north when a letter arrived informing me of how Joaquin's undercover mission went. There weren't much details on the piece of paper to prevent leaking information in case someone intercepted it, so the entire trip back home, my mind was whirling with the three words we've come up with during times like this.

Fire out cold.

The second in command, Beatriz, pointed her index finger at the door to Joaquin's room. There was nothing out of the ordinary when you look at it at first, but as I stepped forward, I caught a strong whiff of smoke and even saw some soot at the gap underneath the door. When my hands touched the doorknob, it was scalding hot but I shrugged off the pain and twisted it.

To say that the room was a mess was a complete understatement. Light was seeping in from where Joaquin managed to create a whole in the wall, debris scattering the floor. All of his furniture was either covered in ashes or burnt into nothing. The space where he used to have his bed was now covered in what appeared to be broken pieces of wood that was burnt. Parts of the floor had burn marks on it and some of them were still sporting soot, as if the fire had just been put out. Sitting in one corner of the room was Joaquin, legs bent and elbows sitting on his knees. His head was leaning back on the wall as his chest rose up and down, fast enough for me to decipher that he was far from calm.

I closed the door behind me and walked forward, seeing how his fists clenched at the sound of my footsteps. Ignoring the ash on the floor, I sat down in front of him and clasped my hands together, waiting for him to open his eyes. I wasn't looking for an explanation as to why he destroyed the room, because I'm sure he had a good enough reason why. Something happened during his mission and I didn't bother asking the others since I wanted to hear it from him.   

"I thought you wouldn't be back for another week." He said quietly, eyes opening and I inclined my head when I saw a hint of ember in them, but it quickly disappeared.

"That was the plan." I nodded my head. "Did you get to finish the mission?"

Joaquin's body grew stiff at the mention of the mission and he avoided my eyes, focusing on a specific part of the floor that was not burnt. "I already gave the information we got to Beatriz." The mission was successful then, but that doesn't explain the wreckage we were currently sitting in the middle of. Silence wrapped around us as I waited for him to speak while he continued to stare at the floor. Joaquin's entire stance was guarded– closed off. I've only ever seen him like this when Orion left us and Joaquin didn't even break anything during that time. "I came back alone."

Now I understood. The mission was a two-man job and from what I heard, Joaquin was accompanied by Roberto, a Fura that had been with us for two years. Most of the time, Joaquin would always pick him for the missions since Roberto wasn't talkative and always focused on the mission itself. He mostly kept to himself, but everyone trusted him with their lives, including Joaquin. "You have to find a healthy outlet for this." I said, standing up and dusting my clothes. I opened his closet, which was oddly untouched, and brought out the broom that was kept there.

"This won't happen again." He replied and I looked back at him. In the twenty years since Joaquin became a descendant, he's never experienced someone dying because of him until today. Everything made sense– the fire, the wreckage. The reason was justified, but with the life we lived, he had to control his anger more since dying was not uncommon in our line of work.

I dropped the broom and walked back to where he was still sitting, bending down so that our faces would be on the same level. "It will." I said and I couldn't help the sound of guilt in my voice. He noticed this too but didn't ask anymore questions, and I was grateful for that. "In a few decades, it's just going to be us again and the people who are living in this house will be gone. You can't keep ruining bedrooms every time someone dies."
          
"How can you think like that?" I looked away as voices and memories began creeping into my mind but I immediately pushed them away. "Like death isn't a big deal."